Pure Blood
by paperplaness
Summary: Draco Malfoy is ill with what he thinks is a muggle illness He becomes so ill that he has to sneak out of school to see a muggle doctor. But what happens when the actual diagnosis is far worse than he could ever imagine? A Draco/Ron fic COMPLETED
1. Nightimes

**Chapter One - Nightimes**

_**Breathe**_

_**Everything will be okay**_

_**Just breathe**_

I know its stupid but those words i say silently to myself help. Its the first day back at Hogwarts and i feel like a train hit me. I havent been feeling well for a while. Fuck it. Malfoys dont get ill and in the event that they do they dont moan about it. I will sleep it off. My head can no longer bear the light or noise of the great hall, Crabbe and Goyle wont notice me leave, fat fuckers too busy shoving food down there throats. Me? I cant bring myself to eat a thing. It will just come straight back up so i slowly get up and walk out of the great hall.

I cant walk for very long before i start to feel dizzy, i need to sit down on one of the stairs. I tell myself to breathe. I finally pick myself up and i get to the common room.

I smile as i hit my bed. I need some sleep._**I'll be better in the morning**_ Thats what i tell myself. Thats what ive told myself everynight for the last fornight. But now that im back at school things will be better. I cant let a stupid illness get in the way of my studies. I cant. I fall asleep. I sleep for about 5 hours when i wake up cause im freezing. I get a shiver up my spine. I check the time, 4.50am. I lie there with my covers wrapped around so cold. I get goosebumbs all over my body. Im irritated that ive woken up. This happens often, some nights its waking up to find im so hot i can hardly breathe. I know that i wont get back to sleep. I will just lie there. And thats where the trouble starts

My mind starts to wander. It forever asks questions. Those questions drive me mad but i always answer them

_What is wrong with you? _

_**Its probably just a cold.**_

_What if its not?_

_**It is. It will go away soon.**_

_What if it doesnt?_

_**It will. **_

_What if it gets worse?_

I ignore that last question. Im too weak to answer it. The voice asking questions has been taken over by someone playing the drums. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. I lie there in the darkness. It will be light outside soon. I force myself to get up. It takes me about 10 minutes. I slowly walk into the bathroom and turn on the taps. _**A nice warm path will take the pain away. **_I sit on the edge of the tub as i watch it fill. I quickly look in the mirror. Im still in Hogwarts standards good looking. My hair is still the lightest shade of blonde and it loosely hangs over my forehead. I havent been eating and it shows. My jawline is sharper but my body isnt skinny. Im muscular and i am most definetly physically attractive. The bath is filled and it feels almost euphoric as i get in. Thats all i needed. I let the warmth of the water surround me. _**I will be okay. **_

I lie in the bath for about three quarters of an hour. I force myself out and dry myself off. Still admiring my body. When i catch a glipse of it. _**Another fucking bruise**_. This one was on the side of my thigh and was big, purple and ugly. _**Fuck sake**_. The thing was i didnt even know how id got it. They would just appear. I had one on my torso although it was fading it was still fucking ugly. I bumped my arm last week and i didnt feel a thing and i ended up with a big swollen brusie. I guess im just one of those people who bruise like a peach. _**Nothing to worry about**_. I tell myself.

So its about quarter to seven and everyones waking up. Still feeling slightly weak i get dressed. I just carry on as normal. I gel my hair the same way. I look the same as i did before i got this whatever the fuck it is. I decide that i will not let this...cold get me down. Im a Malfoy. _**Malfoys are not weak. **_

Slowly i head to the great hall. Today i will be better. Today i will study. _**It will all be okay**_.


	2. Nosebleeds

**Chapter 2 - Nosebleeds**

'You gonna eat that Malfoy?'

I shake my head 'Be my guest'

I watch as Crabbe shoves the slice of toast down his throat. I drink water. I know i should eat something. I want to but i feel so full. Which is bizzare seeing as i havent ate in...days. I reluctantly grab an apple and shove it into my bag. I will eat it later.

I sigh as i walk with Crabbe and Goyle to the first class of the day. Potions with the Gryffindors. Fucking great. Last thing i need. We walk in the classroom and sit at the back. I watch the golden trio walk into class. They all look the same. Potter still has that ugly scar, Mudblood still looks excited about the lessons and Weasley, well Weasley just looks like Weasely. Usually this is when id go and harras them but im tired and my head hurts. All i can think of is getting through this lesson without passing out.

Snape walks in. Everyone shuts up.

'Today we will be working on a concentration potion. Everyone will work in pairs. I will choose who you work with'

'Potter with Goyle

Longbottom with Crabbe

Granger with Parkinson

Weasely with Mafloy'

Fuck. Not Weasely. I watch as he sulks over and sits beside me. We both say nothing. I look out the window. Its sunny outside. My head still hurts and i feel weak.I imagine being outside, just walking

'Are you gonna do anything Malfoy? Or just sit there?'

He breaks my daydream, back to reality i turn and face him.

'Fine. What goes in first?'

We work on it in silence for about 20 miniutes. I was always good at potions and im pleased to see that it looks like its correct. I get even more pleased when i hear Snape shouting at what could only be another messed up potion by Potter.

'Potter! Why is this potion pink?!'

'I er dont know sir..'

I smile. Weasley notices.

'Your such a smug git Malfoy' He says

'And you Weasel have no sense of humor' I laugh 'Trust Scarhead to fuck up, even the mudblood can do better than him'

He looked so angry and it felt good.

'Fuck up Malfoy. Or i'll fuck you up' He hissed

I laughed 'Or what? What are you gonna -' _**Oh no**_

I raised my hands up to my nose. Yep blood. The second nosebleed id had this week. Weasley had a horrifed look on his face'

'Malfoy? Erm Professor Snape. I think we have a problem'

Snape spun round. I knew he would put 2 and 2 together. 'Malfoy go clean yourself up. Weasely 10 points from Gryfinndor'

He didnt protest. I should have said something but by that time the bleeding had become so heavy i had to literally run out of the room. It took me two minutes to reach the boys bathroom and i just let the blood splash in the sink. There was alot of it. I titled my head back in an attempt to stop the bleeding. _**Fuck **_i thought. This was the first day back, the first fucking lesson and i had already succumed to this......flu!?! I felt angry and weak. I cleared myself up and just looked at my reflection. I had to admit, i looked paler than usual. My eyes were bloodshot and i felt sick. Why? Why was this happening to me? At that moment i was tempted to go to Pomfrey but decided aganist it. I couldnt stand that old bat. But my mind told me_ You need to see a doctor_ and for the first time, i agreed.

The problem was how would i leave school to see someone? Leaving on the first day would raise suspicion, especially from a Malfoy. I also couldnt see a Magic doctor. It could get back to anyone. My mother or worse my father. I needed to see a muggle doctor and i needed to do it without anyone noticing i was gone.

After thinking for a while i decided that using a portkey i would sneak out late at night and go to a muggle hospital. I would be told i had flu and given some muggle medicine and it would go away. I smiled as i walked out of the bathroom and headed to my next class. I was in such a optomistic mood i took the apple out my bag and took a few bites. I was almost excited about seeing this doctor. He would probably even think i was wasting his time! Either way i would get rid of this cold. It would all be okay.


	3. Hospital

**Chapter three - Hospital**

The lessons were a bore and the dragged on forever. I couldnt wait till evening. To get rid of whatever this was. I couldnt eat dinner, my stomach hurt. I doubt anyone would miss me. I went to lie down as i was feeling shit and feverish. I slept for a few hours and it was 11.30pm when i woke up. I got dressed. A simple grey jumper and jeans. I slowly crept out of the common room. The prefects would be a problem if they caught me so it took me about 20 minutes to leave the school.

I slowly crept outside and grabbed onto the portkey. It took me to a horrible little street in London. I was already feeling weak and dizzy. I looked around and was thankful when i saw an accident and emergency sign. I walked in and imediatley notcied the smell of hospital, you know that horrible smell of disinfectant, hit me instantly as i walked to the reception.

'My names . . . erm Drake Price and i need to see a doctor'

The receptionist was young and had red hair. 'Okay i will need a few details'

She asked me the usual muggle questions. What age i was. 17. Where i lived. That one was tricky i ended up saying i was between houses at the moment. She told me to sit down and i would be seen to shortly.

I waited 25 minutes.

'Drake Price? Dr Calvin will see you now'

The nurse lead me to a room and i was met by a doctor. He was about mid 30s and wore glasses.

'Hello Mr Price, Im Dr Calvin and what seems to be the problem?'

I told him. The bruising, the nosebleeds, my lack of appetite, weight loss, the night fevers. Everything. He listened and nodded as he typed on his computer. He lowered his glasses and asked me questions

'When did these symptoms start?'

'A few weeks ago'

'Have you taken an medication?'

'I havent'

He looked at me in a weird way, like the way a person who has really bad news looks at you. I felt slight panic and my stomach was in knots. _**Stop being stupid it will all be fine.**_

His eyes returned to his computer.

'Well Mr Price, im afraid im going to have to run a few blood tests, just standard tests you understand. We will also need to do them tonight'

I just nodded along like an idiot. I was confused. Why did they need to do this blood thing? Why wasnt he shouting at me for wasting his time? All that was wrong with me was a cold.I felt panic and my mind asked the question _What is wrong with you? _

'Mr Price, you will need to go to consulation room C4. I will be in shortly. The nurse will take you'

We went. I sat on a chair. The room had a sink, a few cupboards and a hospital bed. I looked at my watch 1.30am. I didnt know how long i would be here for and i doubted i would be getting any sleep tonight. Which sucked as i had classes tomorrow. I was thinking about what time i would get back when Dr Calvin came in.

'Okay Mr Price, im going to have to ask you to roll up your left sleeve. This may hurt a little so try not to think of the pain'

It hurt as he shoved the needle in my vain. Unless youve had blood taken you wont know how it feels, it feels like someone is literally bleeding you dry. Dr Calvin was obviously a very stupid doctor. I hadnt been eating properly and he was taking my blood i went paler and paler and as cliched as the saying is my world went black.

'Mr Price?'

'Mr Price?'

My eyes slowly opened. I was still on the bed and i still felt drained. It took all my strenght to sit up.

'Ah good to have you back with us Mr Price. Dont worry that happens often, we are nearly finshed. I just need to do a bone marrow biopsy, standard procedure. Nothing to worry about right now. Could you please remove your shirt and lie on your front. Now this may hurt a little and please try not to faint again'

He did the bone thing. It hurt but i didnt faint. I just lay there looking at the floor. Getting off the bed was awful. I felt dizzy and sick .I was hoping they would look at the tests and tell me it was just flu and that would be it but they didnt, Dr Calvin just looked at me and said

'Mr Price, we will need to send these samples away, this will take a few days. We will need to see you again on Friday evening. Will that be okay?'

I nodded and i had to admit i was pissed off. I didnt think i would need to come back. I know Friday was only three days away but still,

'For the time being you should get plenty of rest. If the symptoms get unbearable you should come back straight away'

I just kept nodding

'Also is there anyone you can bring with you to your next appointment?'

I froze, i hadnt even told anyone i was sick. And who the fuck would u bring? Crabbe? Goyle? Ha those oafs would embarrass me. I didnt really see the point in bringing anyone. Why would i need to? No. I was doing this alone.

'No, theres no need'

'Okay well you can go home now Mr Price, if you want to call a taxi theres a phone at the front desk. I will see you on Friday'

So i left. I was happy to leave, that hospital smell was disgusting. I inhaled the fresh air and looked at my watch. 2.30am. If i was going to get any sleep tonight i had better be getting back. I walked to the alleyway and grabbed the portkey. I landed with a bump on the grass outside of the school. It took me less than 5 miniutes to get into my dorm and 2 seconds to get undressed. I quietly crept into bed and my mind started asking questions.

_Why did they need to take those tests?_

_**Its probably just routine.**_

_Why do you have to go back?_

_**I dont know.**_

_You dont think its serious do you?_

_**No. Shut up.**_

I had to admit i was pissed. Why did i need to go back? I mean, this thing whatever it was was going to go away. It was just the muggle flu. I felt angry at the stupid Dr. The bit of my back where he did that bone marrow thing hurt like fuck. I had to lie on my front. That was gonna be very painflu tomorrow. Friday couldnt come fast enough. Okay i was slightly angered that he didnt just give me some pills to make it go away but maybe he would on Friday. The blood test and bone thing were standard procedure. He said so himself. I refused to let my mind think anything else. I couldnt. _**Malfoys are NOT weak. **_I had three days left. I decided there and then to concentrate on lessons and put all this hospital shit out of mind. After all. It was only muggle flu._** It would all be okay.**_


	4. You don't look well

After getting home from the hospital i slept for a couple of hours only to wake up absolutley roasting in a sheet of sweat. I kicked my bedsheets of and looked at the time. Half past six, i knew i wouldnt get back to sleep so i just lay there thinking about the hospital. Still confused as to why he didnt say 'Youre fine, its just a cold. Heres some pills. Stop wasting my time' Why the tests? Stupid Muggles. Having to give me all these stupid jags to tell me i have a cold. After twenty minutes of lying in bed i decided that i would have some breakfast today. Even if it was just a slice of toast, it was a start. I had noticed that my hipbones were sticking out a little. I didnt like it. I also had stupid potions with the Weasel today. Great. I should have felt guilty for Snape blaming him for my nosebleed but i didnt. I didnt give a fuck. I would just get through the year focusing on the task at hand.

So i got up and got dressed. Checking myself over and over in the mirror. I looked paler. I looked thinner. My whole body ached. I had brusing on my neck, it almost looked like a hickey. My hair was still perfect though. It was heavily gelled back in that Malfoy way. It was my best feature. After reasurring myself i looked acceptable. I headed down to the great hall. I walked in. Saw all that food and though i was going to be sick. _**No youre going to eat something. **_I told myself. I slowly walked over to the Slytherin table and sat across from Crabbe and Goyle who were elbow deep in food. I took a slice of toast, buttered it and nibbled on it. The thing was, i felt so full. It felt disgusting to have in my mouth and it took all my strenght to swallow one bite. After doing this three times i gave up and sipped on water to help rid of the taste. I felt _so _weak. _**Dont be so fucking pathetic. **_I got up and went to classes. They all were equally shit. I couldnt concentrate on anything. I constantly felt sick. I looked at my timetable, the last class of the day was Potions with the Weasel. Fuck. I sigh as i walked over with Crabbe and Goyle who were too busy talking about the girls they'd shagged to even notice me. I hoped they wouldnt, i didnt want to talk about the opposite sex. Maybe it was just this illness but id never really been attracted to females. Pansy was just a device that i could control. I refused to sleep with her. I refused to sleep with anyone. I, one of the most fuckable boys in school, was a seventeen year old virgin. I know i should be ashamed at this but im not. I dont care right now.

I get to potions class to see the Weasel already sitting there. He was picking at the ingredients. I walked over and sat down. It was just so akward. When we werent shooting insults at each other. I looked at what he was doing the way he was stirring the potion then looked at the list on the desk.

'Wrong'

'What?' He said

'Youre doing it all wrong!' I said 'Its not supposed to be red, give it here'

It felt good snatching the stirrer from his hand. I was good at potions and in control. Also concentrating on potions took away the focus of the constant aching throughout my body. After 5 minutes the potion was how it should be.

'Done. The correct way'

'No need to be smug Malfoy' He snapped

I grinned

'And by the way, ive got detention everynight for the last week thanks to your stupid stunt'

I laughed 'Poor little Weasel! Next time i will break my leg, maybe then you'll get expelled'

'How did you do it? What spell did you do?'

'What?' I asked 'Dont be so stupid Weasel, i didnt do it on purpose, if i wanted to frame you i'd do it for something good'

'You mean it just happened?'

'No shit sherlock. God your thick' I snapped

He looked me up and down. 'Are you sick or something? You dont look well'

I froze. I didnt think he would ask me that. I could feel cheeks going red.

'Just shut the fuck up Weasel'

He looked angry 'Fine. Fuck you Malfoy'

We didnt speak for the rest of the lesson. My head was spinning. Crabbe and Goyle had barely raised an eyebrow since id got ill. I would frantically check myself in mirrors. I thought yes i was losing weight but overall i still looked good. It felt like it had all been for nothing after hearing that. It bothered me and it shouldnt have. Over the years me and Weasel have called eachother every name under the sun. I never thought past his comments but that 'You dont look well' bothered me.

When we were dismissed i pratcially ran out the room. Not even looking at him. I headed straight for my room and threw myself on my bed.

**'Are you sick or something? You dont look well' **

How the question spun round my head. It angered me. It infuriated me. Of all people to ask about my wellbeing why did it have to be the Weasel. Of all fucking people. I'd started getting ill during the summer, I sat around the house most days slept in till two. What was there to get up for? The symptoms started around July. I used to eat a shit load, pizza, chips, crisps you name it. I was one of those bastards who could eat whatever they wanted but didnt gain a pound and then i just got up one morning and the meer sight of an apple would have me vomiting. Then the night sweats came, i would wake up one miniute fucking boiling hot and freezing the next. It was exhuasting. But did my mother notice? No. Did she ever say 'Are you sick or something?' No.

Why, of all people, did it have to be the Weasel!?!

Well it didnt matter anyways, just one more night and id be back at that hospital with Dr Calvin moaning about me being a hypocondriact and me being given some symptomatic relief. I smiled at that last though. _**Everything would be okay. **_


	5. Diagnosis

It was only one day left till Friday and boy did it go slowly. I was still having a hard time eating anything. I had to ask out to the toilet in Ancient Runes class so i could go be sick. I just was feeling so ill. I just couldnt concentrate on anything and was so thankful when classes were over. I went to lie down but my mind was telling me _**You need to eat something**_. Weasel's 'You dont look well' comment was true. It was a bit ironic really. We have called each other some vile, unspeakable things but he'd crossed the line when he asked about my welfare. I caught my reflection in the mirror and i looked so awful. I had bruises all over my body now. I had massive bags under my eyes and i was losing weight. I looked like a junkie. After 5 minutes of staring in the mirror i felt tears forming in the corner of my eyes but i furiously forced them back. **Malfoys are NOT weak. **My mind told me. I got changed into jeans and a big hooded zipper so no-one would notice i was getting thin. I sat alone. I didnt even look for Crabbe and Goyle. I didnt care. I _forced_ myself to eat dinner but the macaroni cheese tasted like razorblades. My body was trying to force it back up but i wouldnt let it. Didnt they have fucking heating on in this fucking place?! I was_** freezing**_. I contiued to force myself to eat and felt someones eyes on me. I looked around and sure enough the Weasel was staring at me. He noticed i caught him and turned to the Mudblood. _**What the fuck was his problem? **_He was enjoying seeing me look like a fucking druggy. Fuck him i thought as i returned to my dinner. I was going to finish the whole meal but my body was crying 'No youre too fuell'. I gaged, i was going to be sick i felt it coming up. I heaved as i ran out the hall causing people to stare at me and as so as i left i was sick. In the corridor. Filtch wouldnt be happy. I felt dizzy as i waited for more vomit to come up. None came and i headed to bed, feeling like a failure at my attempt to eat. I went to bed praying for some sleep. No night sweats tonight _please please please._

My prayers went unanswered.

I woke up at 3am and then 5am again. I was so warm. I was covered in sweat. I ran myself a bath and put a towel over my full lenght mirror. I couldnt face myself right now. I wanted to cry but i wouldnt let myself. I was not weak .I was a Malfoy. By the time i got out the bath i just shoved on some boxers and fell straight back into bed again. I had no intention of going to classes today. No Weasel in potions. I fell asleep.

By the time i woke up, it was five o'clock. Too late to even bother going anywhere. I felt better. Id finally had a decent sleep. I had the hospital appointment at 7.00pm. Which would be easy to sneak out at. I just had to make sure no teachers caught me. I was looking foward to this. To getting some pills or something to get rid of this shit. I had been like this for at least a month now. No more.

I got up and got dressed. Nothing fancy. Trainers, jeans and a grey jumper. That jumper used to be tight on me and show off my muscular body. Now it was getting loose.

By the time i left the common room it was twenty past six. I had to creep out. Soon though i was outside on the school grounds and grabbed on to the shoe that was the portkey.

I was in that vile little alleyway again in London. It was getting dark as i went into the foul smelling hospital. I didnt go to accident and emergency this time. It was a place called _Pathophysiology _. Took me a while to find. I walked up to the woman. It was a different one this time.

'How may i help young man?'

'I have an appointment with Dr Calvin. My names Drake Ma - er Drake Price'

'Okay, please take a seat and Dr Calvin will be with you shortly'

I sat down. The waiting room was nothing fancy. A few plastic chairs and a table with muggle magazines on it. There was a child with his mum and a couple holding a baby. I was the only one who was alone and for the first time that kinda bothered me. I didnt have time to dwell cause i heard -

'Drake Price? Dr Calvin will see you now'

I followed her. The nurse. She had a short uniform on that left nothing to the imagination. I feared i would end up with a hard on but i didnt. Not even a semi. This illness was taking its toll. We eventually got to the room. Dr Calvin looked pretty much the same as last time. He was really sporting the 'im a raging workaholic' look.

'Ah Mr Price, how have we been?' He asked with a smile

'Okay thanks, still a bit sick' I said

'Not too bad i hope, please take a seat'

I sat down and he shut the door and it was just me and him.

He looked at me in that way again. The 'i have bad news' look. I began to panic.

_**Don't be stupid! Youre fine, he's about to tell you himself. **_

'We have your test results back from you blood test and bone marrow biopsy and we have seen slight . . .abnormailties'

My eyes widened. My heart started beating faster. This is where he would tell me 'Yes Drake, you have muggle flu. Its normal. Heres some pills, see ya'

'Mr Price. You see your blood cells, well your white blood cells are not maturing enough and continuously multiplying and are being overproduced in your bone marrow. This is whats causing your symptoms. You know - the night sweats, nosebleeds and weight loss'

I felt well releived really, now they finally fucking knew what was wrong with me. 'Okay' i said.

He looked at me sternly. 'Mr Price, we have strong evidence that you have Leukemia, well Acute lymphoblastic leukemia to be exact'

I felt more relief, it had a name. Muggle flu had a name. 'Okay' i said again.

He looked at me in that way again. 'Mr Price, do you know what luekemia is?'

I looked at him. 'Erm no'

His face now had a look of sympathy. 'Mr Price. Leukemia is a type of cancer'

I knew what that was.

_**Cancer. **_


	6. A Malfoy Doesn't Cry

**Cancer.**

**Cancer.**

**Cancer.**

It went round and round in my head. That word. It was inside me right now. The Leukemia. It was running through my veins. It there every second of everyday , slowly destroying my immune system. It was slowly destroying me.

I found it hard to speak. He didnt speak. I wanted to run. I wanted to run as fast as i could. From the hospital, from him and most of all from the leukemia.

I closed my eyes.

'How long have i got?' My voice cracked as i asked for the prognosis but i didnt cry.** A Malfoy doesn't cry.**

'Without treatment it could be as little as a few months, but with treatment we can hopefully fight it' He answered

I opened my eyes

'Okay' I said. Taking it all in

'We dont have to decide anything tonight, I think you should get some rest, i would like to see you again within the next week ok?'

'Okay' i repeated

I got up and left. I had another appointment booked for next Wednesday, i imagined i would have had to make a decsion. Life or Death. I just wanted to run and i did. Out of that fucking hospital. I ran to the alleyway. Dreading going back to school. I grabbed on to the portkey and in a flash i was lying on the grass. I didn't bother to move. I just lay there looking up at the moon. The word still spinning around my head. I wanted to cry i wanted to scream.

**Cancer. **

I checked the time. 11.57 pm , nearly midnight. I got up and went inside. Knowing everyone would be in their common rooms. It was peaceful as i walked. I wasnt tired. I decided to go the long way back.

'Malfoy?'

I spun round. It was the Weasel. Of all fucking people. He was still in his school robes.

'What are you doing wandering around at this time Malfoy?' He snapped.

'What the fuck are _you _doing wandering around at this time?' I asked, in the most spiteful way i could. In some pathetic attempt to hide all this shit and just be the Draco Malfoy that everyone was used to.

'I had detention with Snape, apparently i gave some kid a nosebleed in potions class' He said as sarcasitically as he could

I didnt say anything.

'By the way Malfoy, where the fuck were you today? Just back and already your cutting class, daddy wont be impressed' He jeered

'Shut the fuck up Weasley'

I was feeling dizzy, my head was begining to bang. I thought an arguement would make me feel a little better but the leukemia was taking its hold again and i just wanted to go to my bed.

'Aww hit i nerve did i? Is ickle Malfoy scared he will get into trouble by daddy'

'Go away' I said

He looked surpised at how passive i was to his attempts to anger me. He gave me that look again, you know the one? He looked me up and down with a raised eyebrow.

'What the fucks up with you?' He said in a softer voice 'You alright?'

I wanted to say 'No im not fucking alright, do i look fucking alright? Does this disgusting disease i have growing inside me not show?!' I hate him. I always have but he's the one person that notices and im so angry at that. It couldnt have been a Syltherin or anyone else except him. I cant bear to contemplate what he thinks of me right now. He's probably laughing at me. I panic. He cant know. No one can ever know. I couldnt bear the shame. No. Im a Malfoy. I still have some pride left.

'There nothing fucking up with me Weasley' I said spitefully 'Mind your own fucking business'

'Fine' He said

'Fine. Im going now' I snapped

'Whatever Malfoy' He said quietly

I slowly walked away. I couldnt face anyone asking questions. No one could know. It was bad enough that this was slowly eating its way through my insides. But the fact that this was a muggle disease make me want to be sick. _**How did this happen? **_I thought as i walked to my room. _**Was it my fault? **_

I decided that i would get some sleep. I'd feel better in the morning. I was a Malfoy, that meant i had to be strong. I got changed into just boxers and a t-shirt, which felt loose. I tried so hard to switch my mind off, to forget about everything. But i couldnt. I kept thinking about my horrible situation, about how i had contracted a disgusting disease and how it was probably going to kill me. But the worst thing off all was that i was alone. I had never felt so alone in my life as i did then. Only fucking Weasley asked how i was and he didnt care. I had nobody to help me through this. No one to come with me to the hospital and ashamed as i am to say that hurt, that hurt so much it was almost unbearable. I could feel the tears welling up and the ** 'A Malfoy doesn't cry' **saying in my head but i ignored it. I fell to the ground, buired my face into my knees and cried, i cried so hard that i didnt think id ever stop. I felt so weak, so pathetic. The leukemia was already winning.

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Thank you to Mevanoui and Rin5o for the


	7. Muggle Diseases

**---Btw Ive changed the storys name from White Blood To Muggle Flu - I think its better ----**

**------------**

I was half asleep when i opened my eyes. Slowly letting the daylight in. I felt sore all over. What day was it? What time was it? What happened yesterday?

Then it all dawned on me. The Leukemia, the hospital, Weasley. Everything

Fuck. I said to myself. I looked at the time. 10.08am. It was Saturday. No classes today. That made me feel a little better. I could just lie in bed all day. I considered having a wank. Thing was, the female body just didnt get me off anymore. I would even just try to not think of anything. But that didnt work. I hadnt had a wank in ages. I gave up.

I lay in bed for another hour just thinking. Thinking of the Luekemia. I thought maybe a bath would wash it away. I got in and scrubbed myself till i was nearly bleeding, stupidly hoping it would be washed away down the plughole. It didnt. I ached when i got in the bath and i ached when i got out. No. This leukemia wasnt going anywhere.

After drying myself off i noticed another bruise but i ignored it. I also noticed as i was getting thinner. Horribly thin. I could see my hipbones sticking out. It was disgusting. I shoved on a pair of baggish levi's and a baggy zipper in an attempt to hide the fact that i was getting too thin. I decided that i would spend my time in the library researching leukemia. Maybe there was a cure or a way out. Dr Calvin had given me two opitons: Don't have treatment and die. Or get treatment and maybe live. No. There _must _be another way out.

I went downstair. Hoping i wouldnt bump into the weasel again. I couldnt face him. I couldnt face the possibilty that he might care. I didnt want him to. I didnt deserve it. He probably didnt anyway. Why would he. We _hated_ each other.

I entered the library looking for the Muggle Studies section. I found it and was thankful there wasnt anyone else there. I looked at the books and eventually found one called **The A-Z of** **Muggle Diseases. **I went and sat at a desk and looked at the index. Calcium Depostion disease, Calivirus infection, Canavan disease and there it was **Cancer. **I looked at the different types.

Cancer of the Lung (Lung Cancer)

Cancer of the Lymph Glands (Non-Hodgkins Lymphomas)

Cancer of the Bladder (Bladder Cancer)

_**Cancer of the Blood (Leukemia)**_

I went to the chapter.

**What Is Leukemia?**

_Leukemia is a type of cancer. Cancer is a group of many related diseases. All cancers begin in cells, which make up blood and other tissues. Normally, cells grow and divide to form new cells as the body needs them. When cells grow old, they die, and new cells take their place._

**What are the different types of Leukemia?**

_**Acute lymphoblastic leukemia —**__The blood cells are very abnormal. They cannot carry out their normal work. The number of abnormal cells increases rapidly. Acute leukemia worsens quickly. _

**Prognosis**

_Age at diagnosis: children between 1–10 years of age are most likely to develop ALL and to be cured of it. Cases in older patients are more likely to result from chromosomal abnormalities that make treatment more difficult and prognoses poorer. Statistics have shown only 3 in 10 adults survive it._

I nearly cried after reading that. It just wasnt fair. If i was a child i had a better chance of surviving it but cause i was 17 it was more likely to die. It was just so dire.

**Treatment **

_Treatment for acute leukemia can include chemotherapy, steroids, radiation therapy, intensive combined treatments (including bone marrow or stem cell transplants), and growth factors. Chemotherapy is the initial treatment of choice. Most ALL patients end up receiving a combination of different treatments. There are no surgical options, due to the body-wide distribution of the maligant cells._

I didnt know much about chemotherapy, only that it was supposed to be hellish. I looked at the side-effects

_The treatment can be physically exhausting for the patient. Current chemotherapeutic techniques have a range of side effects mainly affecting the fast-dividing cells of the body. Important common side-effects include: Pain, Nauseas and Vomiting, Anemia, Malutrition, Hair loss, Psychological Distress such as Depression, Weight Loss and sometimes Death. _

The last word gave me a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach.

**Death.**

I couldnt bring myself to read anymore. I felt sick. I grabbed the book and left. The choice was so awful i'd rather someone else make it for me. If i had no treatment i wouldnt see my eighteenth birthday. I wouldnt see christmas. I would probably still be a virgin. There was nothing more shameful than that Draco Malfoy dying a virgin. I could cry at the shame. If i had treatment it would probably be a horrible, painful process. I might lose my precious hair. I couldnt bear that. Also, who said it would work? I could be spending my last months alive in some vile hospital.

As i left the library i saw the golden trio. Potter and the Mudblood had become a couple. They looked so happy and it made me so mad. They didnt have cancer. Apart from exams they had nothing to worry about. It made me so so angry. I purposely banged my shoulder against Potters just to make myself feel a bit better. It worked. I was about to walk away when i heard

'What the fuck was that for Malfoy!?'

I laughed. 'Just cause you're a fucking idiot'

'Fuck you Malfoy' He said

'Fuck you Malfoy' I mimiced in a baby voice

'Leave it Harry' Hermoine said attempting to pull him away.

'No i wont leave it!' Potter shouted 'He's a fucking bastard! Even his _friends _have abandoned him. He's just like his pathetic parents'

'At least i have parents' I snapped back

He leapt foward at me, knocking me to the ground and he was on top of me punching in the face. Adding more pain to my already aching body. I tried to hit him back but the Weasel was already trying to pull him off me 'Leave it Harry!' He yelled as Potter got up

'Youre scum Malfoy, i hope you drop dead' He spat

'Just leave it Harry' Ron said 'Lets just go'

'Why are you protecting him Ron?!' Harry shouted 'You hate Malfoy'

Ron looked uncomfortable 'Im not protecting him, i just think we should go'

Potter looked angry 'Fine! You want to defend him. Thats fine! C'mon Hermoine, lets leave these two to it!'

Potter grabbed Mudbloods arm and they both left. It was just me and Weasely. It was awkward. Like it was in potions. He reluctantly reached out a hand to help me up and i reluctantly took it.

'You didnt need to do that' I said

He shrugged 'It was nothing'

'Thanks' I whispered making sure no one else heard

'Its alright' He said 'You okay?'

**No.**

'Er yeah im fine' i lied

'You still look like hell' He said lightheartedly 'You sure your okay?' He asked

**No. Im not okay. I have Leukemia and im probably going to die. And whats worse is im going to die all alone and a virgin. **

'I just havent been sleeping. Thats all'

'Okay' He said

'Okay, well i er better be going' i said

So i left. With a tiny tiny bit of respect for the Weasel. He was the only person asking about how i was. He may have only being doing it out of some morbid curiosity. He may have just been trying to fill the gaps of the awkwardness but at least _someone _asked.

That made me feel better as i headed to the great hall for something to eat. Still undecided as to what i would do

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Ron's POV

Malfoy had gone. Harry was pissed at me but i would make amends later. I couldnt help but feel worried about Malfoy. He looked _so_ unwell. I shouldnt have gave a fuck but i did. I don't know why. It just seemed that he was getting sicker and sicker everytime i saw him. I tried to annoy him when i bumped into him. I wanted to see the old, nasty Malfoy. He was easier to deal with than this passive ghost-like replacement. He said he was fine and that made me feel a bit better. I just didnt understand why he wasnt doing what he always used to do. Why wasnt he making fun of how poor i was? It just didnt make any sense. When he didnt show up for class the other day i felt a tinge of worry. That nosebleed looked nasty, my first intital thought was that it was a prank. Then when he said it wasnt i worried. But he said he was fine maybe i was just over - reacting. I was about to walk away when i saw something lying on the ground, it was a book. Malfoy must have dropped it. I picked it up and read the title.

**'The A-Z Of Muggle Diseases'**

**--------------------------------------------------**

Please please review or i will kill Draco. Okay? Your reviews keep me and this story going. Cheers. xxx


	8. Tell Him

Thank you to Mevanoui, Shruika ,E-FlatMinor and Jordy-Pordy for all reviewing. I knew very little about Leukemia untill writing this. Never underestimate Wikipedia! Thanks for reviewing though. It gives me confidence and keeps me motivated.

**Back to Draco's POV **

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I couldn't help but feel a little respect for Weasley. He had stopped Potter nearly knocking me out.I felt better inside but outside i felt like shit.I had tried to eat a slice of toast but i couldnt even look at it. I just felt_ so _full. I couldn't afford to lose anymore weight. My whole body ached. It never stopped. The Leukemia was always there, always making sure i was hurting. It depressed me. Feeling defeated i decided to go to my room for a lie down.

I couldn't help but think of what i was going to do as i lay on my bed. If i didn't get treatment i would die, and soon. But if i did maybe i could beat it. Im usually a fighter but i cant help but feel scared at how _painful _it could be. And whats more how would i hide it? Would i get worse? Would i have to take different kinds of pills every hour of everyday? I decided to look at the book and do some more research on treatments when i realised

**Gone.**

**The book was gone.**

I was overcome with a fear of panic. I felt sick. Had i left it in the great hall? I practically jumped off my bed and ran down to the great hall. It wasnt there. I realised i must have left it in the corridor after my fight with Potter. Fuck. I went out retracing my steps. I looked everywhere frantically.

**It wasn't there.**

That left me to the only other conclusion as to where it might have gone. And it was the worst conculsion i came to.

**Weasley.**

That bastard that fucking _bastard_. Just as i was beginning to hate him less. I couldnt bear it. He was already asking questions about me. What the fuck would he think now? I needed to get it off him before he told anyone. I needed to get him alone. Not only did i have to worry about this fucking disease which was slowly eating its way at my immune system but i also had to worry about this shit. I ran up to the Gryfinndor common room. The fat lady looked at me

Password? She asked

'I er i dont know it' I said quietly

'You want in here _without _knowing the password' She asked looking surprised

'Yes. Its a matter of urgency' I said 'Please'

'No one gets in this room without knowing the password' She said

'Please, _please_ may i get in' I begged

'No'

'Bitch. If you dont let me in then i'll fucking wait you stupid cow' I snapped

'Fine. Wait'

I waited, i couldnt sit a peace. My left leg was shaking as i sat on the stair. He might not even be in there. He could be fucking anywhere. It was dinner time. I went down to the great hall with my eyes peeled at all times frantically looking for a redhead. I saw him. He'd obviously made up with Potter and Mudblood. They were all sitting there, Potters arm around Mudblood, looking adoringly into each others eyes. It made me fucking sick. He was sitting across from them. Staring into space. I was standing at the entrance, hoping he would notice me. I didnt need to. Without Potter or Granger noticing he got up and headed for the entrace. _**Thank god**_. I though.

He walked out. Not realising i was standing there. He looked so troubled. I didnt want to think why. I couldnt be about me. He didn't care.

'Weasley?' I shouted at him

He spun round

'Malfoy?' He said

I walked towards him.

'I er need to talk to you' I said quietly. Hoping no one else would hear me.

'Okay' He said 'You wanna talk here or what?'

'My room' I said even more quietly

He didnt say anything. He just followed as we walked up to the Slytherin Common room entrance. I muttered the password so he wouldn't hear. I was thankful only a few first years were in. Everyone was either at dinner or fucking about downstairs. We walked up to my room.

I let him in, he looked around.

'Where is it?' I asked in the most frank way i could. Hoping he wouldnt fuck me about and just give me it back.

'What?' He said

'The book. Just give me it back' I said as calmly as possible. Trying not to lose my temper.

He didn't say anything.

I took a deep breath 'Weasley. Don't fuck me about. I know you've got it. Please just give me it back and i will forget this ever happened'

He looked at me again. That sympathetic look that i couldn't bear. 'Whats wrong with you Draco?'

I felt sick. Not only did he call me by my first name but he also knew something was up.

**Tell him**.

My mind was telling me to confess. No. No one could no. I would do this alone.

'There's nothing fucking wrong with me _Weasley' _I snapped 'Now just give me the fucking book!'

He looked at me

'Im not fucking stupid _Malfoy_, what is wrong with you?

**Tell him.**

'Im fine'

'No youre not. Whats wrong with you?'

**Tell him.**

_**No. Fuck off. **_

'Nothing'

'Don't lie to me. I saw the book. What's wrong with you?'

**Tell him.**

'You can tell me'

**Tell him.**

'I wont tell anyone'

**Tell him.**

_**I can't.**_

**Yes you can. Tell him.**

I opened my mouth.

'I...'

**Tell him.**

'I er...'

**Tell him.**

'Draco?'

**Tell him.**

'I..'

**Tell him.**

'I ... er...i'

**TELL HIM!**

'I have Leukemia'

I told him.

I looked up to see his face. He looked shocked. Horrified even. I didn't blame him. It was a digsusting disease. None of us said anything.

'Leukemia?' He asked, his voice was quiet and shaky

'Yes' I replied. Lowering my head in shame.

'Oh my god' He said quietly.

I expected him to run. To run into the great hall and shout 'Oi everyone! Malfoys got Leukemia! Muggle Cancer!' And i expected eveyone to burst into fits of laughter. But he didnt move.

'Draco' He said using my first name 'Im so so sorry'

He felt sorry for me. He felt sorry for me and i couldn't stand it. I didn't want his pity. I didn't deserve it. I'd been so evil to him. He was a nice guy. But i couldn't bear him - or anyone - feeling sorry for me.

'Don't be' I said 'I deserve it'

He moved closer towards me.

'Don't be fucking stupid. Of course you don't' He whispered.

I looked up at him 'Yes i do! Don't you get it? I'm being punished! I have some filthy muggle disease inside me right now! Its probably going to kill me! I am going to die! IM GOING TO FUCKING DIE!' I screamed at him i felt tears running down my cheeks. I was crying infront of fucking Weasley. Dying now wouldn't be so bad.

He put his arm around my shoulder 'No. No youre not going to die Draco. I mean you can beat this right?'

I was still crying and as ashamed as i am to admit it his arm around me felt nice. It felt comforting. It made me feel less alone.

'I don't know anymore. Im in pain _all_ the time. My life isnt even worth living anymore anyway' I whispered. Tears still running from my eyes.

'Don't say that' He said. His muscular arm tighted around me. Bringing my face to his chest. He smelled nice. A masculine scent. His voice was cracking. He couldn't possibly be close to tears. It wasn't as if he was dying.

'Its true though' I said 'Life just doesn't matter anymore, there's no reason for me to get up in the fucking morning anymore. Potter's right. I should drop dead. Who the fuck would miss me if i fucking died?' I sobbed

'I would' He whispered.

I looked up at him. He looked down at me. He put his hand in mine as i buried my face in his cheek. Inhaling his scent. Still crying.

'Its gonna be okay Draco' He whispered in my ear 'Its all gonna be okay'

_-------------------------------------------_

**Review or Draco and Ron both die! Ha ha ha ha xxxxxxxxxx**


	9. You're Not Alone

Lol at the reviews. I was only messing. Never underestimate emotional blackmail hahahahah! I won't do it again i promise. Okay :) xxxx

This chapter contains both Ron and Draco's P.O.V. i figured now than Ron knows we should hear his side. However if yous dont like it and just want it all to be Draco then just say.

BTW ive got twitter - Miss__Carroll - Follow me yeah? :)

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Rons P.O.V

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I woke up in my own bed. I let him cry. He just looked so unwell. I'm glad he told me. I wasnt expecting that reaction, i was expecting violence or him just to deny it. When he broke down i didn't even think about what i was doing when i put my arm around him. Just this urge to protect him. Tell him it would all be okay when i didn't even know if it would be. He wasn't as bad as he made out to be. He was tired so i left him on his bed. I felt sick. Questions spun round and round in my head. How could he have Leukemia? Had he seen a doctor? Did anyone else know? I needed to know. I needed to see him. Today.

I got dressed and I went down to the living room and saw Harry and Hermione cuddled up on the couch. Don't get me wrong i was happy for them but i constantly felt like i was a third wheel. I couldn't even wind up Hermione in the playful way i used to Harry was so over protective. They were always together. They didn't even notice if i left. It sucked. But i had bigger things to worry about now. Malfoy.

'Alright Ron?' Harry said stretching

'Yeah' I lied 'What you upto today then?' I asked

'Nothin much. Miones studying as always' He said as he rolled his eyes back

Hermione playfully hit him 'You should be studying to if you want to ace your N.E.W.T.S'

He kissed her. It was one of the moments where i felt like a third wheel the most. They were still kissing when i left. Usually i cared but i didnt today. I would go downstairs, get some breakfast and find Malfoy, make sure he was okay and get some answers.

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Draco's Pov

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I woke up feeling sick and hot. The fever was in full force and it felt like someone was jumping on my lungs as i struggled to breathe. I lay in bed fully clothed. Realising what happened last night. He knew. Weasley knew. I cried in front of him. Fuck. I felt so fucking stupid. I couldn't face him. I couldn't face fucking anyone. I was weak. I was pathetic. I was in agony. Inside and out. Still, a part of me wanted to see him again. For him to tell me it was all gonna be okay. A part of me wanted to smell his scent again. I could still smell him on my clothes. He smelled amazing. I snapped myself out of it. He was a Weasley and he was a guy. I shouldn't be fucking thinking about how nice a guy smelt. No. I wasn't going anywhere today. I thought as i fell back to sleep. Inhaling the fading scent of Ron Weasley

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Ron's P.O.V.

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I couldn't really eat anything. I was gutted when he didn't come down. He was getting so thin so the last thing he should be doing is skipping meals. I guessed he was still in bed. Either sleeping or hiding. I wondered how i would get in Slytherin Common room. They wouldn't fucking let me in. Fuck. Then it hit me This was _Malfoy_ i was worrying about. If this were last year and someone told me he had cancer i would have probably laughed. But i wouldnt ever do that now. I wouldn't even think about it. I finally understood the saying_ 'You wouldnt wish cancer on your worst enemy'_. I still wondered however why i put my arm around him last night. Why i held him until he slept. Why i let him cry on me. Why i had this urge to protect him. Why i so badly needed to see him. Why i didn't just walk away? It was fucked up. But i let the worry fill me. I let the urge to protect him overcome me. I needed to see him. Even if it meant fucking climbing the castle wall to his window.

Luckily i didn't need to climb any wall as i saw Blaise Zabini eating breakfast. He was one of the very few decent Slytherins and i respected him. I walked over to him.

'Alright?' I said

He looked up 'Hey Ron'

'Hows things?' He asked as he ate

'Yeah not to bad' I said trying to sound as chilled as possible 'I need a favour'

'Okay sure' He said 'What?'

'I need potion notes. Malfoy's got them. Do you mind going and getting him? I though he might be in here but' I shrugged

He finished drinking his coffee 'Yeah okay, come up and i'll get him, he's probably still lying in his pit. Lazy fucker'

I put on a fake laugh. Eager to see Malfoy 'Thanks'

We headed up. He tried to make small talk. About Qudditch and girls. I talked back but i wasn't even paying that much attention. Just thinking about what i would say to Malfoy when i saw him. It was just so fucked up. I couldn't bear it.

We got to the common room entrance. 'Cover your ears' He said as he muttered the password as the entance opened. 'Wait here'

'Cool. Thanks Blaise' I said getting anxious

'No bother'

He went in.

--------------------------------------------------

Draco's P.O.V.

'Draco?'

I woke up to a knocking on my door and Blaise Zabini's voice

'Draco? Its me Blaise, can i come in'

I was half asleep as i heard him. Checking i was decent i decided to let him in 'Okay come in'

He entered. I liked Blaise everyone did. We weren't close. I think he thought i was trouble._** If he only fucking knew!. **_

'Er Ron Weasleys outside for you. Something about Potions notes'

What was _he _doing here? I immediatley caught on about how he lied to Blaise just so he could see me.

'Oh erm okay tell him i'll be down in a sec'

'Okay' Blaise said as he closed the door.

I gasped in agony as i got out of bed. Slowly sitting up to find my jeans in a heap on the floor. I must of kicked them off. I shoved them back on and changed from my grey zipper to a black jumper. Shoved on some trainers and went out. I headed down to the hall when i saw him. Looking as healthy as ever. He had a what was becoming six-pact which made up for the hand me down clothes he wore. His hair was short but messy. He looked good. Which made me feel like a fucking anorexic freak.

Blaise was gone when i got there he didn't even say anything. Just looked up into mid air. Trying not to make eye contact with me.

'Malfoy. I'

'Outside' i said as i broke his sentence. He nodded. We both walked in complete silence. Yards apart so no-one would see us together. I decided we would go down beside the lake where no-one would catch us. It was always quiet and no one really ever went down there. Beside's the first, second and third years would all be at hogsmeade so i was pretty sure we would just be alone.

I turned to him

'So what is it you wanted?' I said. Trying not to sound spiteful but also not soft

'Just wanted to see how you were, you weren't at breakfast this morning'

I shrugged 'Wasn't hungry'

He looked at me 'You need to eat Malfoy'

My cheeks turned red 'Yeah..well you need to stop lecturing me Weasley. Okay? I wasn't hungry. That was all. I'll fucking eat at dinner okay?!' I snapped at him and immediately felt guitly. He was only asking about how i was and he was right. I did need to eat. Last thing i wanted to do was upset him. I mean he had the power to tell everyone about the leukemia.

'Sorry' I said quietly

'Its alright, so.... how you been?' He asked

'Leukemic' I laughed

'That's not fucking funny Draco!' He yelled looking both angry and upset 'We need to deal with this _now _before it gets anyworse. Have you seen a doctor?'

'Yes'

'And?'

'He gave me two choices, i either get treatment and maybe live or don't and die. He thinks if i pick the latter it will be within a few months'

He looked shocked. Both at how calm i was and how horrible i made it sound.

'When are you seeing him next?' He asked, taking it all in

'Wednesday'

'Okay. Well he might start the treatment then and the sooner the better, we need to know what type of treatment you'll be getting, how long it will last and we will need to know how bad the treatment will be but however bad im sure-'

I stopped him mid sentence

'Im not even sure i want treatment' I said calmly

He looked me in the eye, those brown eyes looking at me. I could see his face. He looked horrified. Like he was looking at a dead mangled body.

'What?' He whispered, his voice cracking.

'I don't know if i want to go ahead with treatment' I repeated in the same dull, calm tone.

'You can't be serious' He said '_You can't be fucking serious'_

'What the point? The book said only 3 in 10 adults survive it. The side effects of the treatment sound fucking awful.I can't go through it alone' I said. My mind wasn't really made up by then but after hearing myself say that it was. I would die. I would die _**alone**_.

'OF COURSE THERES A FUCKING POINT!' He screamed at me 'YOU'RE FUCKING SEVENTEEN! YOU WONT BE FUCKING ALONE! WHAT ABOUT YOUR FUCKING PARENTS?! THEY'LL BE FUCKING THERE'

It didn't take long to realise

'You have told them haven't you?' He said 'Please tell me you've told them'

I just stood there. Hoping my silence would answer his question.

'So let me get this fucking straight' He said angryily 'You've been going through this fucking hell all by _yourself_?!'

I laughed 'You dont get it. You just dont get it, do you?!' I screamed 'I HAVE A _**MUGGLE **_DISEASE!! I DRACO FUCKING MALFOY HAVE A DIRTY DISGUSTING MUGGLE DISEASE!! ITS INSIDE ME NOW!! YOU KNOW WHO MY FUCKING DAD IS! HE'D SOONER WASH HIS HANDS OF ME THAN HELP ME!!_** I'D **_WOULDN'T HELP ME!! HE CAN'T FIND OUT! HE CAN'T EVER FIND OUT! I WOULD RATHER DIE' I felt tears forming in my eyes as i tried to catch my breath. He sat to work all this shit out.

He got up and came over to me. He picked up my shaking hand and but it in his, realising that i was cold. I was fucking freezing.

'You're freezing' He said quietly. Taking his scraggy zipper off and putting it around me. Rubbing my arms as he did. In some attempt to warm me up. It was big on me and it smelt of him. I felt comfort as i inhaled the scent. I looked up at him, he was nearly crying. His eyes all watery with tears. His hand in mine.

'Listen to me Draco. _We_ are going to fight this_. You _are going to fight this. You're not alone. If you don't want anyone to know. Fine. But if you think im just going to sit back and watch you die then you're seriously fucking mistaken. Do you understand me?' He was calm. The tone was almost threatening. He tried not to cry as he said that. I was in shock. He _cares_. He cares about me. The voice in my head said _**You know he's right.**_

'Promise me' I said 'Promise me you won't leave me. I can't deal with this shit on my own. I _need_ you' I knew i should be embarrased at asking a Weasley for help. But i wasn't i_ needed _him. _**I needed Ron fucking Weasley.**_

He pulled me closer to him. Holding me tight towards me. My head on his neck. Smelling his beautiful scent.

'I promise' He assured me 'I promise more than i have ever promised anything in my life. On Wednesday we are going to that hospital and we are going to deal with this. Okay?' He said squeezing my hand. Tightening his protective grip on me.

'Thanks' I said. It made me feel _so_ much better to hear that. I could have happily stayed out there in his hand-me-down zipper forever. Inhaling his magical scent

'Lets go inside. Your getting too cold' He got up and reached out his hand. I happily took it.

So we went in. His hand tighted around my arm. As we approached people he let go. Careful to give nothing away.

'I better go. You gonna be okay?' He asked

'Yeah, can i keep the jacket?' I said not wanting to take it off

'Sure' he smiled

As he went to left he moved his head closer to my ear making the hairs at the back of my neck stand as he whispered

_**'Remeber Draco, you can fight this. You're not alone'**_

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**Awww! Cutee! I love Rons amazing strenght of character in this chapter. He rocks ,they both do. Please please please review! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**


	10. Run

Guyz my fucking computer is acting up!! So apologies for the slow update. Thanks to everyone for reviewing :) xxxxx

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I woke up shivering and sweating at the same time. I was fucking _freezing_. I was only in boxers. My whole body ached in pain and I gasped in agony as I attempted to sit up. I looked at the time, 7.02am my eyes then looked over at my bedcovers lying on a heap in the ground. I could have cried. I was just feeling so damm ill. I reached over to the chair beside my bed, picked up Weasleys jacket and brought it to my face, inhaling the scent. _**How could someone who lived in hand-me-downs smell so fucking good!?**_ I knew I should feel ashamed for thinking about him in anything but a hateful way but I couldn't help it. I should be feeling humiliated. That he knew about my disgusting illness, that he'd seen me cry twice. But I didn't feel ashamed. I felt relieved that someone knew. It made me feel less alone and he was forcing me to fight it. I wanted to give up, to let the leukemia win and die tragically feeling sorry for myself but he wouldn't let me. When he told me he wouldn't watch me die, it was the kick up the arse I needed. I would fight this. I would not take this lying down. I would beat this.

I closed my eyes with my hands gripping the mattress as I went to sit up. My whole body ached. My joints were so fucking sore. It felt like someone had repeatedly ran over me with a tuck. Taking a deep breath I stood up. Knowing that if I didn't get up now I wouldn't have time to eat. I didn't even want to fucking eat I just wanted to see _him_ again. I slowly staggered into the bathroom for a piss and even that hurt. It depressed me that I couldn't even take a piss without it being fucking agony. As I walked over to wash my hands I saw myself in the mirror and to say my reflection disgusted me is a understatement. The person looking back at me was pale and had massive bags under his eyes which had sunk into his face. _I looked like a fucking smackhead_. I took a look at my whole body. My hipbones now jutted out and my ribcage was slightly showing. It all looked so awful. I looked so awful. _Like someone who had cancer_. It made me want to fucking cry but I didn't. Still hearing__my father say _**A Malfoy Doesn't Cry**_ in my head. I was thankful my hair still looked good. Okay it had gotten a bit thin but it still looked good. Even though I hadn't gelled it back yet. The almost skeletal figure staring at me in the mirror was enough to make me decide I would eat something. I slowly got dressed. Grateful that they made the robes quite baggy, definitely enough to hide my skinny frame from people. I gelled my hair back. Admiring it in the mirror. It definitely was my best feature. After twenty minutes of convincing myself that I looked good enough for people to see me I headed down to the great hall.

The smell of melted toast on butter hit me instantly and it made me feel want to gag. But I wasn't going to leave here until id eaten something. Seeing Crabbe and Goyle I went over and sat down. I didn't even say hi, I didn't feel the need. They were too busy eating to notice me anyway. I looked over to see if he was there. He was. He was having a conversation with Potter, who had his arm over-protectively around Granger. I didn't even know why he felt the need, Granger was a most definitely not attractive. My eyes then returned to him. He looked good. His smile, his short messy hair, his muscular body. He looked the figure of health, a contrast to me who looked like I was a fully fledged crackhead . I then looked back at all the food. Slowly, with my hand shaking a picked up an apple and brought it to my mouth. Despite protests from my stomach I took a bite. It was disgusting, it felt like I was eating worms. My body was screaming at me to spit it out and I wanted to. But, with the image of my skeletal body in my head, I swallowed it. Feeling almost proud of myself for doing so. I took another bite and another and another until I only had an apple core in my hand. I looked up and saw Wesley looking at me, he flashed me a smile before returning to his conversation with Potter. That made me feel better, just the fact that someone knew just how _hard_ that was for me eating that apple. Feeling content I got up and signaled for Crabbe and Goyle to do the same. I was almost excited about going to classes, it would be nice to hear about something other than this fucking illness for a change. To pretend it didn't exist for a few hours. I got even more excited at the fact that I potions this afternoon, which would mean I would be able to talk to Weasley.

Morning classes were a bore and dragged on forever. The classes did take my mind off the leukemia though but I wasn't even concentrating. I just kept thinking about _him_, about what I would say to him. I just couldn't stop thinking about him. So much that it began to piss me off. I shouldn't be thinking about another guy that much. I wasn't gay. Okay I'd never had sex and I was having a period of leukemia-induced impotence but I most definitely wasn't gay. I was Draco Malfoy, I could have _any _girl that I wanted. When all this shit was over, I would pop my cherry and I would fucking enjoy it. Weasley was just a friend. I wasn't gay.

It didn't take long before it became time for potions. I walked with Crabbe and Goyle, not even bothering to properly listen to their pathetic conversation. Apparently Goyle had fucked some Ravenclaw at the weekend. He was such a manwhore. Then again how he got anyone to willingly fuck him was fucking amazing. We walked into class, Weasley was already sitting down. Fidgeting with the ingredients. I went and sat down beside him. He looked up at me then looked around. Making sure everyone was too busy to notice us. He then whispered to me

'So, how you been?'

'Okay. I managed to eat a whole apple this morning' I bragged, as if it was something to be proud of.

He smiled at me 'I know. I saw. Well done'

'And how have you been?' I asked

'Fine' He whispered back 'How'd you sleep?'

'Good' I lied

It was tough trying to maintain a conversation with him in a class full of people. We had to pretend to _hate_ each other. So no one would get suspicious. It was tough. The class went by quickly. He quietly whispered in my ear before leaving

'So I'll see you at dinner yeah?'

I nodded. Flashing him a smile as I did.

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Ron's P.O.V.

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It was dinnertime. Harry and Hermione were busy looking adoringly into each others eyes and whispering what I can only imagine to be dirty things in each others ear. They didn't notice me but I didn't care. My eyes kept looking at the Slytherin table. He wasn't there and it made me mad. Did he not see how skinny he was getting!? He was looking sicker and sicker each day and he needed to fucking eat! I couldn't help but be mad at him. Then feeling guilty for feeling mad at him. He was ill, I should be more sensitive. My mind began to think the worst, I imagined him lying on his bedroom floor, blood pouring from his nose, screaming for help. It scared the shit out of me. But the other half of my mind began to wonder why I was even thinking of him at all. This time last year I hated him. He hated me. Now? I thought about him _all_ the time. My first though when I woke up was 'Is Malfoy okay?' I wondered why I felt so strongly for my former enemy. _Could I be crushing on Draco Malfoy? A guy? _No. This shit with Malfoy was weird but I most definably wasn't gay. I was just doing what anyone else would do if they were in my position. That was all. I wasn't gay. Okay I hadn't had any action with girls in a while. Lavender Brown being the last one and all I got from that was a drunken wank and she wasn't even that good. That didn't mean I was gay. However, letting my panic about Draco become irrational, I grabbed a sandwich and got up to leave. I would fucking force feed him if I needed to. I was all set to leave when I heard Harry

'And where do you think you're going?'

'I erm need to go to the library and study, you know for N.E.W.T.S and that' I lied, trying to sound as convincing as possible.

'You? Study!?' He laughed 'Well your going to have to cancel it. We need Qudditch practice tonight'

Fuck. Since Harry had become Capitan he had ruled with an iron fist. I knew I couldn't get out of it. He just get pissed off with me and I couldn't be fucked with a row so feeling defeated I put the sandwich down and followed him out to the field. Knowing all I would think about was Draco, and how I wouldn't get to see him until we went to the hospital….

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Draco's P.O.V.

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By the time Wednesday night came along, I wasn't feeling any better. Infact I was feeling fucking shit. I knew I would have to fight this. Dr Calvin might even start treatment tonight. I could barely breathe as I staggered out the bathtub. Making sure I looked presentable for both him and Ron. Making sure I looked normal and not like a fucking invalid. After shoving on a pair of levis and some trainers I put on Weasleys hand-me-down jacket. Knowing that I would need that scent to comfort me tonight. It was far too big on me. I couldn't help but imagine the possibility that this could all just be a mistake that Dr Calvin could tonight turn round to me and say _'Guess what Draco_!? _We made a mistake and you don't have leukemia!' _I couldn't help but wish that would happen. Even though deep down I knew the leukemia was inside me. Just eating its way at my insides. Killing every healthy part of my body. And it fucking scared the living shit outta me.

I was _frightened_.

I had agreed to meet Ron outside where no - one would see. It was about 7.00pm when I got there and it was getting dark. He was already there. Looking the figure of health, making me hate myself and how I looked.

'Hey' I said quietly

'Hi, how are you?' He asked

'Im okay. You know I don't mind going alone' I lied. In some pathetic attempt to get back some pride.

'No im coming with you. I made you a promise remember?' He said 'Is that my jacket?'

'Err yeah, you said I could keep it' I reminded him.

He smiled 'Course you can. Just don't know why you like it so much'

'I just do. We better get going then' I quietly said reaching out my hand to him, he grabbed it as I grabbed on to the portkey within a flash we were both in that vile little alleyway. I let go of his hand.

'Where's the hospital?' He asked

'Down the road. C'mon and by the way they think my names Drake Price'

He laughed 'Okay'

'You'll have to change your name' I said

'What to?'

'I don't know...arm Ron. Ron.. Ron West'

'West? How'd you think of that?'

'There's a road sign down there that says 'turn west''

We both laughed as we walked into that fucking awful smelling hospital. I led him up to the _Pathophysiology _desk. It was still the same receptionist.

'Erm I have an appointment with Dr Calvin. My names Drake Price'

She looked at me 'Okay, and who is this?'

Not letting Weasley speak I said 'This is my cousin, Ron West'

'Okay well Mr. Price, Mr. West please take a seat'

We did and I began to feel sick. Imagining what he would say to me. At what treatment I would get. What if I was too late for treatment? And he would just sit back and let this kill me? Ron didn't say anything. He just sat there. Staring into space. I panicked at what he must be thinking. Thinking about me. About how I was an invalid. I was scared. I was so fucking scared. My heart was beating like mad. My left leg was shaking. It was going up and down, up and down, I was so filled with fear I didn't even notice Ron putting his hand on my left leg. Trying to stop it shaking so badly. I looked at him. He looked at me. He was about to open his mouth to speak when-

'Mr. Price? Dr Calvin will see you now'

'Do you want me to come in with you?' He asked me

'No. Its okay' I told him. I know I wanted to say yes but I was already feeling like a fucking invalid. I didn't think I could be properly honest with the doctor if he was there. I didn't want to worry him.

He looked disappointed 'Okay. Well if you need me I'll be here okay?'

I

I nodded.

I entered Dr Calvin's office. He still looked like a fucking workaholic, a workaholic with a bad fashion sense with his messy hair, big white coat, designer glasses and stubble. Fucking muggles

'Ah Mr. Price, and I see you brought a friend' He said in a patronizing way.

'Yeah, he's my cousin'

'Okay. So Mr. Price how have things been?'

'Awful. The night fevers have been hell. I haven't been able to eat much. Imp getting too thin' I said

'Ash well that's a symptom. The leukemia results in the liver being swollen which gives you a feeling of fullness. It also, obviously suppresses your appetite which will result in weight loss'

I nodded

'So Mr Price, have you decided about what you want to do?' He said in a frank way.

'Yes. I want treatment. Whatever treatment you can give me' I almost fucking begged him.

He smiled 'Good, well, treatment varies from Radiationthreapy to Chemotherapy. We would usually start with Radiationthreapy but seeing as your leukemia wasn't caught early on we would have to recommend to begin chemotherapy. Immediately, if possible'

I froze. My heart stopped beating_. Chemotherapy_. I remembered the list of side effects.

_**'Important common side-effects include: Pain, Nauseas and Vomiting, Anemia, Malnutrition, Hair loss, Psychological Distress such as Depression, Weight Loss and sometimes Death.'**_

That last side effect made my heart skip a beat.

_**Death.**_

I wanted to cry but I couldn't. My mind shouted at me - _**Don't you dare fucking cry**_. I had to be strong. I had to fight this.

'Err okay' I choked, still taking it all in.

'As I said, we will need to start the chemo immediately. I will put you on a course of medication and also give you some painkillers. You may feel quite ill over the next few days. The drugs will need to be taken four times per day and it is extremely important that you do not miss a dosage. Okay?'

He sounded like Weasley as I nodded. Wondering what the leukemia and chemo had in store for me in the new few weeks or even months.

I left his room with a paper bag full of a cocktail of prescription drugs. I was to come back when I ran out and needed a refill. Weasley was still sitting there. Reading the back of a muggle paper. Some shit about football. He looked up when he saw me.

'Hey, how did it go?'

I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream. I couldn't look at his smiling face. He was cancer free. He was happy. He didn't need me. Fucking things up for him. Infecting him with my misery. I wanted to run so I did. I ran straight out of that fucking stinking hospital. Away from Weasley, away from Dr Calvin. I ran, I ran and ran and ran.

I got to the vile little alleyway before I felt like my lungs were going to explode. I couldn't breathe. I felt like I was going to be sick. I felt like I was going to faint

.

'MALFOY?' I heard him shout.

_**Fuck. Why are you running after me?! Run away from me! I am weak and pathetic. Go!**_

'MALFOY?'

_**No. Don't come near me. Please…**_

'MALFOY?'

_**No. stay away…..**_

His voice became louder. I had my back up against the brick wall. Unable to reply.

His footsteps approached me. I looked up and saw him. Looking at me confused.

'Malfoy? What just happened? Why did you run?' He asked, trying to catch his breath, sounding confused.

'Chemo' I whispered

'What?'

'I have to have chemo' I said again. I held up the bag full of pills 'Look'

He kneeled down beside me. Not saying anything. He slipped his hand in mine and squeezed it. I couldn't believe he was here. In this dirty alleyway with me. He deserved better. I wanted to cry so much but my mind kept shouting at me. _**Don't you dare fucking cry. **_

'We erm better get back' He said.

We both grabbed on to the portkey. A flash later we were on the school lawn. Neither of us moved. We just stood there. Not speaking.

He broke the silence. 'You're fighting this Draco. We are fighting this. Together. Don't give up on me now'

I looked at him. I felt the tears coming. I couldn't help it. He looked at me. Not thinking about what I was doing, I violently pushed him up against the wall and kissed him. I shoved my tongue in his mouth and fucking kissed him. Throwing my arms around him. He froze for a few seconds before he kissed me back. His arms running up my back. Sending shivers down my spine. I kept on kissing him. Needing so badly to smell his magical scent, like a junkie needing heroin. He kissed me back. We stayed like that for a few minutes. Until he broke the kiss, gasping for breath.

'What the fuck was that Malfoy?!' He shouted at me

Realizing what I'd just done I grabbed the bag of pills and ran. Leaving him without an answer. I ran, like the fucking coward I am, running away from Weasley, from what I'd just did. Running from reality…..

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Aww! Their first kiss! It was violent and rough but that's Draco all over isn't it?! Poor Draco. xxxxxx Please Please Please Review!


	11. Side Effects

Thank you to my reviewers (The pennylords troll especially - always leaving me lovely reviews! You rock and the best fics are the ones with a fucked up Draco Malfoy in them xxx) It has come to my attention that in a previous chapter i said Ron's eyes when brown when they are infact blue. Apologies. Anyways on with the story xxxxxxxxx

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**when your sparkle evades your soul  
i'll be at your side to console  
when your standing on the window ledge  
i'll talk you back from the edge  
i will turn your tide  
be your shepard and your guide  
when your lost in the deep and darkest place around  
may my words walk you home safe and sound**

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It had been exactly a week since i kissed Weasley. It had been exactly a week since we had spoke. It had been exactly a week since Dr Calvin had given me the pills. It had been exactly a week since i had started chemotherapy.

I am a perfectionist. I always have been and i always will be. I must keep up with life. Leukemia or no leukemia. I must hand my coursework in on time. I must eat three times a day to get my weight up. I must write to my_ bastard _of a father. Lying about how i was fine, how i hated Potter (well that was true), about how i couldn't wait to get the dark mark when i turned eighteen. I must take my pills everyday. I must take them at the same time each day 7.00am. 3.00pm. 7.00pm. 10.00pm. I must force my aching body out of bed every morning. I must put my hair behind my ears when im being sick from the chemo. I must not cry when i get depression. I must get on with life. _I shall overcome. _

I woke up knowing i had potions first thing today. I hated potions. Weasley would be there. He wouldn't even look at me. We didn't speak to each other. I had never felt so let down by someone in my life as i did by him. He had totally abandoned me when i needed him the most. He had promised me that he would be there. I couldn't even think about him without feeling sick. I wasn't thinking when i kissed him and _he_ kissed me back. He was obviously in fucking denial. I didn't mean to do it. I wasn't a fucking faggot. But i couldn't help but hurt when i remembered his face after he pulled away. He looked disgusted. It hurt.

I woke up at exactly 6.45am. Feeling sore all over. I sat up in bed. Running a hand through my hair, pulling it back off my face. I brought my hand back down and looked at the clumps of platinum blonde hair that lay in the palm of my hand. I looked down at my pillow, which was also covered in my strands of hair. I had noticed it had been getting thinner but i put that down to the not eating. I then remembered the list of side effects from the Chemo. One of them was_** hair loss. **_

I shot up out of bed. Screaming in agony as i did. I staggered into the bathroom. I looked in the mirror. Not prepared for the sight that stared back at me. The sight was almost so horrifying i nearly collapsed. I was bald. I still had a few clumps of my hair but most of what used to be my beautiful head of hair was gone I looked like someone had attacked me with hair shavers but missed a few spots. I knew that it was inevitable that the rest would eventually fall out. I was too shocked to realize i was in tears. I held on to the sink as i fell to the floor in a heap in tears. Unable to digest the fact that i now looked like a proper cancer patient. With my skeletal body, sunken eyes and bruised covered body. The baldness was the cherry on top of the cake. I lay on my cold, bathroom floor crying. My body screaming in pain, emotionally and physically. I just looked so fucking_ ill_. It surely wasn't long now before someone noticed how bad i looked. Before they laughed at me and how long before the entire school knew that Draco Malfoy was no longer the healthy, sexy, good looking man he once was? Now he looked like what he really was._ A leukemic_.

Picking myself up off the bathroom floor, i walked into my bedroom. Looking at the time. 7.00am. I went into my bag, and took out the bottle of pills. Not even bothering to pour myself a glass of water, i swallowed two. If you've ever dry swallowed pills you will know of the horrible lump in your throat and the metallic taste in your mouth it leaves. I shoved on my school robes. Knowing i now could no longer hide the fact that i looked fucking emaciated. I went into my drawers to look for a hat. Bingo. I found a grey beanie, shoved in on so my whole baldness was well covered up and looked at myself in the mirror. I looked awful. Like the kids you see in the muggle ads on tv. Like the kids with cancer. I wanted to cry but i didn't. I refused to let myself. Finding comfort in the fact that the pills i just swallowed were right now fighting the Leukemia. That they were killing it. That in a few months time, this would all be some horrible, horrible memory. I suddenly panicked at the thought that one of the teachers might ask me to remove the hat as it was not school uniform. But there was no way that was happening. They would have to expell me before i removed the fucking hat.

I headed down to the great hall. Noticing the stares i received from some of the first years. I wanted to run back into my room and hide under my duvet but i didn't. I walked into the great hall. Only a few people looked up. I sat down next to Crabbe and Goyle. Feeling their eyes on me. With my hand shaking i reached out for a slice of toast. Taking a big bite.

'Malfoy?' Goyle said quietly

I looked up 'What?'

'You look really sick' He said quietly

'Im fine' I hissed, forcing myself to swallow the disgusting toast

'Are you sure?' He asked again

'I just fucking said so didn't i?!' I snapped. I finished off my water 'Im going to class'

I didn't need to ask them to follow, they just did. Not bothering to utter a word as they did. I didn't give a shit. The weren't my friends. They weren't even fucking close.

I went into potions class relived that Weasley had not arrived yet. I tried to be as inconspicuous as i could. Hoping Snape wouldn't notice the hat. I sat down. Deciding that i would wait till Weasley came till we started the potion just so he would have to work. I didn't even care if we fucked it up. I just didn't care anymore. The reflection of my bald self in the mirror this morning had made me very very depressed. I would need to ask Dr Calvin for some anti-depressants next time i needed a refill. I needed some chemical assistance in all aspects of my life. That's how pathetic my life had become.

I didn't have time to wallow in self pity because the ever-so-happy-cancer-free golden trio walked in. Weasley stopped laughing when he sat down. I felt his eyes on me. It was the first time he had looked at me in a week. I didn't turn round to look at him_. I hated him_. Instead i started making the fucking potion. Living up to my perfectionist personality i worked hard the potion was perfect. Snape came over and saw it was the yellow colour it was supposed to be. He looked at me approvingly , giving me some hope that he wouldn't mention the hat on my head and then he just had to go and say.

'Mr Malfoy, enlighten me as to why you have that hat on in my classroom?'

'I just do' I replied

He looked at me. Looking at my bony, skeletal body. He must have known something was up. I was expecting the worst. For him to order me to remove it or even worse, remove it himself. I imagined the horrified gasps from not only my classmates but from Snape himself. But he didn't tell me to take it off , he just walked away. I'd never been so grateful to be in Slytherin. Ever. I took a deep breath as i sat back. Still feeling his eyes on me. I refused to look at him. He quickly wrote something down on a bit of parchment and slipped it under the desk. I took it. Keeping it folded until i made sure no one noticed. I wondered what it said. Probably something like

_**'Malfoy! Nice hat, is that to cover your bald leukemic head you fucking faggot!!' **_

I shuddered at the though. Making sure no one noticed, and not even giving as much as a glance, i opened it.

_**'Malfoy, i need to talk to you, after classes. Meet me in the Astronomy tower at 8.00pm okay?'**_

I almost wanted to rip it up in front of his face. To say 'f uck off and die' to him but i knew i wouldn't. I let my curiousity get the better of me. I scribbled a word down on the parchment, looking at it after i did it. I then folded it up and handed it to him. Not looking at him. Always careful not to look at him. I put on this front that i didn't care about him abandoning me but deep down it hurt. It fucking hurt so much i could barely stand it. By the time he got it we were dismissed. I was the first to leave. I didn't want to talk to anyone. I wanted to go and hide away from the world. Hide from myself.

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Ron's P.O.V.

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I opened the parchment after he'd left the room. I could tell from his refusal to even look at me that he was pissed. Pissed at me. I looked down and read his reply, which confirmed he was mad at me.

_**Fine.**_

A typical Malfoy reply. Not wanting to give anything away. Wanting to cover everything up and put on a harsh, bitter front.

After he kissed me, i just stood there, in shock. In shock at what he'd just done. In shock at him running away but most of all, in shock at the fact that _I_ kissed him back. I only yelled at him because i was in shock. I couldn't believe what had just happened. I wasn't gay.

I didn't sleep that night. From hindsight, i knew i should have just forgot about it and helped him. Like I'd promised to. But i avoided him. I avoided him like the plague. I wasn't at all mad at him. I was more mad at myself. Not for kissing him, for yelling at him. For shouting at a sick seventeen year old boy. I felt_ so _guilty. But the more the days past the harder it got to speak to him. I felt awful. I would find myself looking over at dinner times to his table. I would see him sitting there, forcing himself to eat. With no one knowing how fucking hard it must have been. There was also this part of me that wanted to kiss him again. I was ashamed to admit it. I kissed him back. I kissed a guy back. I enjoyed it. I felt ashamed. I couldn't look at him without thinking about that kiss. So i just didn't look at him.

However when he came into class today, i was shocked. _He looked so so ill_. More ill than I'd ever seen him. And he had that hat on, refusing to take it off. God only knows why. Even Harry, Malfoys worst enemy said

'Have you seen Malfoy lately? He looks like a fucking crackhead who's been on hunger strike for a fucking year!'

I love Harry like a brother but when he said that i wanted to hit him, no i wanted to fucking _kill_ him. How could he and Neville and Seamus and everyone else that was laughing at his sick little joke be so insensitve?! Then i realized he didn't know. No one did. I laughed at his sick joke. My insides screaming as i did. I felt like the worst person on earth. I wanted to punch a wall till my knuckles bled. I wanted to get a knife and plunge it into my throat. I felt disgusted at myself. I needed to see him. Make sure he was okay. Make sure he was taking his pills. Make sure he didn't hate me as much as i hated myself.

I wrote him a note after he answered back to Snape. Refusing to take the fucking hat off. He was fucking brave.

I could only imagine what he would say to me tonight as i sat in class. Constantly looking at my watch. Eager to see him. To sort this shit out.

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Draco's P.O.V.

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What the fuck does he want? I constantly asked myself. Angry at myself for even agreeing to meet him in the first place. I decided i would be late. In some pathetic attempt to piss him off. He deserved it. I went through the day in class after class refusing to remove the fucking hat. I got 50 points taken from the Slytherin house in total. Bastards.

After dinner i went upstairs to take my pills. I necked two and took a swig of my glass of water. I got changed. I still was eager to show Weasley that i could cope just fine without him. That i was brave. That i could fucking fight this on my own. I put on a pair of my best jeans and was angry to discover they were far too big. So big that i had to make a notch on the belt just to keep them fucking up! My nice white jumper looked far too big on me as well. I looked like i had the body of a ten year old boy. It made me sick. I had kept the hat on all day and i decided that i would not take it off till i went to bed. I couldn't face the sight of that bald head. It made me want to fucking heave. I looked at myself in the mirror. I looked like a junkie. But looking at the time , 8.07pm, i decided to head to the Astronomy tower, driven by the fear that if i left it too late, i would miss him.

I slowly walked up the tower. Making sure no one caught me. The hat still firmly attached to my head. I walked in and he was already there. Looking like as healthy as a Greek god. It just wasn't fair.

He spun round and saw me. Looking me up and down. Making me feel self-conscious.

'Malfoy' He slowly said quietly

'What is it you want _Weasley_?' I hissed at him in the most spiteful way i possibly could

'How have you been?' He is eyes never left me. He kept staring at me

.

'Fine' i lied. Not wanting to tell him anything. About the chemo, about the hair. About anything.

There was a dead silence. He continued to stare at me. I stared straight back.

'About last week..' He said

'It was a mistake' I interrupted 'A very stupid mistake and if you've told anyone Weasley so help me god I'll-'

'I haven't told anyone' He said quietly 'I wont tell anyone'

'Good' I snapped.

'Have you been taking your meds?'

I felt so angry at him. How dare he have the _nerve _to ask me that. How fucking dare he!

'What does it matter to you!?' I asked, in the nastiest way i could

He looked upset 'You know it does' He said quietly

'It obviously doesn't' I replied 'You haven't so much as looked at me in the last week' I said. Trying not to let any emotion through in my voice.

'I didn't-'

'You know what Weasley? I kissed you. Bigfuckingdeal! It didn't mean anything and believe me i regret it! But you kissed me back. You. Kissed .Me. Back' I felt so powerful, lying to him, it did mean something to me. As ashamed as i am to admit it.

'I don't regret it' He quietly said. That stopped me in my tracks.

'What?' I asked

'I don't regret the kiss. I regret breaking the kiss and i regret shouting at you. Im sorry'

I thought he was taking the piss. I really did. But his calm voice suggested otherwise. He felt the same. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

'You promised' I said quietly. Looking at the floor. Not looking at his face.

'I know' He said, his voice starting to crack 'I hate myself. Im so sorry'

I looked up to see him standing there. He was nearly in tears. He genuinely was sorry and he genuinely felt guilty.

'Its okay' I said. Shocked at myself for not wanting to make him suffer more.

'No Its not okay. Its not okay that i left you Malfoy! Im a bad person. I promised you. I promised that _we _would fight this together and i let you down. I cant begin to tell you how sorry i am'

I looked at him. At his blue eyes. He was sorry. I felt better. I didn't want to see him cry but to be honest it felt kinda nice seeing him be the weak one for a change.

I put my arm around him. 'Its really okay' I said.

He looked up at me 'I promised you Malfoy, and Im going to keep that promise to you. We are going to fight this thing okay?'

'Okay' i said. Smiling at him as i did .

There was a long silence. We just sat there. Feeling at peace with each other

'Malfoy?' He asked, breaking the silence.

'Yeah?'

'Why have you got that hat on?'

I froze._ No. Not him. Not him as well_. I couldn't show him.

'Because i just do' I said. Hoping he would drop it.

'Will you take it off?' He asked. My heart started beating fast.

'Just drop it Ron' I said.

'No. Please Draco, take it off'

'No. Just fucking leave it Ron!' I yelled. Feeling weird that i had addressed him by his first name twice.

'Please Drake... just show me' He said. Sliding his hand in mine.

I wanted to cry. I knew he would keep asking and asking so i gave in. I slowly brought my hand up to my head. Closed my eyes and removed the hat. Hearing the gasp that came from Ron. I felt tears running down my face. I opened my eyes. He was looking at my hair, well where my hair used to be. He was crying aswell. At that moment i felt so ugly. More ugly than my fucking house elf. I got up to run. Unable to look at him. And what he must be thinking.

'Draco?' He said grabbing my left arm as i tried to run

'Im ugly!' I howled 'Im so fucking ugly!' I said crying uncontrollably

'No Drake, no you're not' He pulled me towards him. I smelled his scent again.

I looked up at him. He tears were still falling from his ocean blue eyes as he tilted his head towards mine and slowly kissed me. Not like the last one. This one was soft and not forced. I responded. Slowly kissing him back. Tasting his salty tears as i did. Slowly sliding my hands around the back of his neck. Enjoying his tongue in my mouth. I pulled away for a breath. Looking at as i. He smiled at me.

'You're beautiful Drake'

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**when you say that i'm no good and you feel like walking  
i need to make sure you know thats just the prescription talking  
when your feet decide to walk you on the wayward side  
up upon the stairs and down the downward slide  
i will, i will turn your tide  
do all that i can to heal you inside  
i'll be the angel on your shoulder  
my name is geraldine, i'm your social worker**

**i see you. need me? i know you do.**

Awwwwwwww! Cutee they made up :) Btw the song at the start and end of the chapter is the song 'Geraldine' by Glasvegas. Please Review! Thanks xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx :)


	12. Lumos

It had been eighteen days since i started chemo and i was still feeling fucking awful.

I lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. Ron was lying next to me fast asleep. I was almost jealous of the fact that he could sleep so peacefully. He had his muscular arm around me. It was nearly 6.00am and i woke up feeling so fucking hot. I would usually kick of my bedcovers but i didn't want to wake Ron up. It had been eighteen fucking days and i was still feeling like shit. I wondered if this was normal. I figured seeing as i had been experiencing the side effects of the chemo it was working. I had been sick, had the worst headaches and lost my hair and not just on my head. It had gone from everywhere. My legs, my arms, my chest, _**everywhere**_if you catch my drift. I was trying my hardest to eat properly as well but i was still disgustingly skinny. I would never let Ron see me without clothes on. It had been over a week since we kissed again and since then he'd slept (and i mean_ slept_) over three times and we'd kissed countless time since then. I didn't know if we were like a couple, i didn't consider him my _boyfriend _or anything. The whole situation was fucking strange. No one knew obviously. We would always meet in secret or wait till after curfew.

However people were beginning to notice how ill i was getting. Fucking McGonagall had told me to go see Pomfrey when i wandered in her class_ five _fucking minutes late. Saying 'Mister Malfoy not only do you arrive late in my classroom wearing that ridiculous hat but you also do not look well enough to attend. You will go and see Madame Pomfrey before you faint in my classroom. Now' _Stupid bitch_. I didn't go obviously. I knew what was wrong with me and i was fighting it. Couldn't she cut me some fucking slack?!

Also if things weren't bad enough my father had owled me about how i would be eighteen in a few months and how i was to receive the dark mark on the night of my eighteenth birthday. Fucking great. He knew nothing about the leukaemia obviously but he just had to kick me when i was down. I had put it out of my mind for the last month, my main concern of course being the cancer. But after the chemo worked and i was in remission i would have to get the fucking dark mark. I just couldn't think about it right now. Maybe when i was better I'd have the guts to say no.

I looked at the time. 6.40am. I slowly lifted Ron's arm off of me. Biting my lip to stop myself from screaming in agony as i attempted to sit up. I looked at the sleeping Ron. He was beautiful. It took me a while to admit to myself that i liked him. I liked him alot. I laughed as i imagined my fathers face if he found out. The anger, the hatred, the disappointment. He never ever would find out of course.

I got up out of bed slowly and quietly staggered to the bathroom for a piss. The chemo was making my piss a funny colour. I looked at myself in the mirror. The bruising had gone down somewhat but i still looked liked a fucking junkie. There was also another problem. My eyesight. I mean i could still _see _but it was alot harder to read. In ancient runes, I had to hold the book upto my face. It was also making me become quite clumsy. I bumped into a group of Ravenclaws a few days ago. It was _so_ embarrassing. I didn't tell anyone though, not even Ron. He would just worry.

I went back into the bedroom and sat on the side of my bed. The curtains were shut so I grabbed my wand_** 'Lumos' **_i whispered. Nothing happened. _**'Lumos' **_i said again a little louder and a very dim light came through. I reached into the drawer beside my bed and took out the bottle of pills. I would need to go to Dr Calvin for a refill as there was only sixteen left. Just enough for today and tomorrow. I shoved two in my mouth and swallowed. Not liking the horrible metallic aftertaste that followed. It was now 7.02am. I would have to wake Ron up if he wanted to sneak back into Gryffindor common room without getting caught. I shoved on my grey hat and poked him in the shoulder.

'Ron?' I whispered

He didn't move.

'Ron?' I said louder 'You need to get up now'

He still didn't move

'Ron! Wake up!' I shouted

He slowly opened his eyes, smiling at me.

'What time is it?' He mumbled, rubbing the sleet from his eyes.

'Just gone seven' I said

'Have you taken-

Not letting him finish his question, i answered 'Yeah i have'

'How you feeling?'

'Yeah better' I lied

'Okay' He smiled as he sat up 'I better be getting back'

He got up out of the bed. Put on his t-shirt and headed towards the door.

'Bye Drake' He said before kissing me on the cheek. Leaving me smiling on my bed. Ready to face whatever the world would throw at me.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

_Ron's P.O.V._

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I quietly crept through the corridors to Gryffindor common room. This would be the third time i did this in the last ten days. Harry and Hermione were getting suspicious about me always going off to 'study'. I didn't like lying to them but it was better than telling them the truth. They would probably never speak to me again. Not only was i sneaking of to be with a guy but the guy was Draco fucking Malfoy. The situation was strange but i don't regret it. I don't regret kissing him. I don't regret sleeping with him in his bed. I wasn't gay. The whole thing with Draco was special. I didn't want to be with him because he had a dick, i wanted to be with him because i just did. I wanted to protect him and be there for him. Keeping my promise to him. I liked him. Maybe even loved him.

I slowly said the password and entered the common room. Quietly creeping up the stairs as i did. I shared a bedroom with Harry so it made it more difficult not to wake him as i crept in. Unlucky for me he was already awake. Standing at the mirror, putting on his tie. He turned round when he saw me.

'And where the fuck have you been?' He said, looking me up and down, realising i still had on the clothes i was wearing last night.

What was i supposed to tell him? _**'Oh yeah Harry i was with Draco Malfoy last night, in his bed, we are kinda seeing each other now and you'll never guess what - he has leukaemia!'**_

'I erm i was just out' I said, quietly.

'Don't lie to me Ron, you still have on the clothes you had on last night. Where i have you been?'

So I lied.

'I was with a girl' I said. It was the most convincing lie i could think of.

He grinned. 'Oh really?'

'Yeah. Ravenclaw. I can't even remember her name' I lied

He laughed 'So you just fucked her then?!'

'Err yeah' I said as i got changed into my school robes

'Cool well Im going to get some breakfast, you'll need to tell me all about it later okay?'

I sighed with relief after he left. I would make some shit up later on.

After getting dressed i went downstairs to the great hall. Draco was already sitting at the Slytherin table. Forcing himself to eat. I was proud of him.

I sat down beside Harry and Hermione. His arm protectively around her as usual. He kept pestering me about last night. About the supposed Ravenclaw girl. I kept having to lie and lie. Hoping he would just drop it. I couldn't wait till after classes so i could see Draco.

After classes i walked with Harry, he had stopped going on about last night. And was now ranting and raving about how much he hated Snape.

'Goyle is worse at fucking potions than me!' He said 'Of course fucking Snape always blames me'

'Goyle is a fucking idiot' i agreed

'Must be ten times worse for you though, having to work with that idiot Malfoy. I'll bet he has that stupid hat on. Fucking loser. He looks so fucking ill these days. Like a fucking druggy'

I just nodded. Trying to restrain myself from beating the crap out of my best friend. I hadn't seen Draco since breakfast. I needed to see him. Now

'Talking of Malfoy, i just remembered i have potions homework i need to get from him. I'll catch you up' I lied. I was getting good at lying.

He sniggered 'Good luck' before walking away. I needed to find Draco.

I practically ran up to the Slytherin common room. Making sure no one was there i quietly muttered the password.

_Merimaculana_

Knowing everyone would be at dinner i headed straight for Draco's bedroom. I slowly opened the door, the curtains were shut. They were always shut. He was asleep in his bed. I sat on the side of his bed and slowly touched his shoulder.

'Draco?'

He stirred

'Draco?'

He slowly moved opened his eyes. Looking at me 'Hey'

'Hi' i said. 'How you feeling?'

'Okay' He said

'You want me to get you something to eat?'

'No its okay. Just lie with me for a while'

So i did. I let him fall asleep again. I had to admit though i was worried about him. He could barely move. But i had this horrible thought at the back of my head. He still looked awful. It made me worry. Was the chemo working? Was he getting better? He had just said he was okay but he wasn't eating. I put my hand on his forehead. He was warm. Very warm. I stayed with him for a few hours. Just letting him sleep. I looked at the time. Nearly ten. I knew Harry and Hermione would start asking questions if i left it any longer so i slowly got out of his bed. Not wanting to leave it any longer. I kissed his head before i left.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Draco's P.O.V.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I woke up to find Ron gone. I was feeling sicker and sicker as i lay in my bed. My head was spinning. The room was dark. The curtains always shut to hide the blinding light away. I still questioned if this was normal that i should be feeling like this after eighteen days. Dr Calvin would be getting an earful when i went back for a refill tomorrow. I looked at the time. 10.00pm. Time for pills. I slowly sat up in bed. Grinding my teeth as it did. Gasping as my aching arm reached out for my wand i couldn't properly see where it was so i had to feel my way to it. I eventually found it.

**'Lumos'** I quietly whispered

Nothing happened

**'Lumos'**

Nothing

**'Lumos'** I shouted. Beginning to panic. Why wasn't it working?

**'Lumos!' **

Again, nothing happened

I tried another spell.

Nothing.

My magic had stopped working.

_**I had become so weak that my magic had stopped working.**_

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This chapter fucking **sucked**. It totally sucks. Apologies. I haven't been feeling well all day so my attention span is at an all time low. The next one will be better though. I promise. xxxxxxxx


	13. Watching Myself

**This chapter is better than the last. This fic is nearly finished! Im surprised ive only been writing it for over a week now!**

**Btw the lyrics in this are 'Running up that hill' By Placebo, One of the very few musical groups i like that aren't hip hop! I know the song is originally Kate Bush but i was listening to the Placebo version. **

**Anyways I really am making Draco suffer aren't i? but its only about to get worse..........**

**Don't forget to review after you've read! xxxxxxxx**

**BTW - I cant be bothered proof reading this, ive put it through as spell checker so if there are any errors - apologies!**

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**Draco's P.O.V.**

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**It doesn't hurt me.  
You wanna feel how it feels?  
You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me?  
You wanna hear about the deal I'm making?  
You be running up that hill  
You and me be running up that hill  
**___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**My magic had stopped working.**

I began to panic. Fuck. Why wasn't it working?!

I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream. _**Why the fuck wasn't it working!?**_

I sat in my bed. Extremely angry. I had become so weak that my magic wasn't working anymore. I felt so low. I was worse than a mudblood. I was scum. There was no magic inside me anymore. I could barely move my bones ached so much. I just wondered how worse things could possibly get. If it wasn't for Ron i would have topped myself there and then but i couldn't do that to him. I_ needed _him. I lay in my bed. I felt the tears fall. I had always thought the chemo was working. That it was destroying the leukemia. It was a muggle disease. A filthy muggle disease. I thought they were fixing it. That the pills were killing it. I still had the two pills in my hand. Wondering if there was any point of even taking them anymore. No. I needed to take them for Ron .I was so distraught as i swallowed two pills. I couldn't speak. I lay in my bed, crying myself to sleep. Unable to cope with the fact that i couldn't do anything anymore. I cried and cried until i feel asleep...

I woke up the next morning angry that i was still here. That it wasn't a nightmare. That this was actually happening to me. I couldn't properly see. I had to repeatedly rub my eyes. I was getting so sick of it. So sick of having to bite my lip to stop myself from screaming. Having to look at my disgusting body in the mirror. Having to wear that fucking hat everywhere i went. So sick of the constant pain my body was in._** So sick of being sick.....**_

Thank god for Ron. The reason i got up in the morning. He had been there for me. He had catch me when I'd fallen. He had told me i was beautiful when we both knew i had become a bald, ugly, walking skeleton. But what would happen if i didn't get better? If the chemo wasn't working. If my days were numbered. If i could die at any second. No. I wont think like that. I slowly got myself up out of bed. Nearly screaming in agony as i did. It felt like someone had punched me in the stomach, over and over again. My neck hurt. My back hurt. My everywhere fucking hurt.

I decided to cut class and go straight to the hospital. I needed a refill and i was too ill to bother to argue with teachers over me wearing the damm hat. I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and looked at my reflection in the mirror. The sight was shocking. I was _so so _pale. My cheekbones were now showing clearly, i had a big bruise on my cheek. My eye's had sunk into my face. I was now officially a walking skeleton. I shoved on a pair of jeans and a Weasleys zipper, knowing i would need the scent and the warmth to get me through the day. After making sure my hat was covering my baldness i left. Needing to get this shit sorted out.

It took me at least 20 minutes to get from the school lawn to the foul smelling hospital. I went to the Pathophysiology part of the hospital. I went up to the same desk and saw the same receptionist as last time.

'And how may i help you young man?'

'My names Drake Price. I need to see Dr Calvin. Now' I said weakly, knowing i would need to sit down soon or i would collapse

'Do you have an appointment?'

'No. But i really need to see him. Its urgent'

She looked me up and down. Hopefully my shockingly bad appearance would show that it was an emergency.

'Okay. Just sit down and i will see if he is available' she said as she picked up the phone.

'Thank you' I said

I waited 15 minutes. The hospital was busier as it was during the day. There was a young child running about in the waiting room. He, like me, was completely bald. I began to feel sorry for him then i remembered the statistics. If you were a child you had better chance of survival. I assumed that applied to all cancers. He would probably be okay.

'Drake Price?'

I looked up to see that receptionist standing in the hallway

'Dr Calvin will see you now'

I followed her to his office. It was hard walking for longer than a few yards. Slowly we got there and i went in. He still looked the same. A workaholic. He really wants to get himself a life.

'Ah hello Mr Price. I understand that you wanted to see me'

'Yes. I don't think the chemo is working' I said as i sat down.

He looked at me with one eyebrow raise 'Okay and what makes you think that?'

'Im not feeling any better. Infact Im feeling worse. Alot worse'

'Okay. Well the chemotherapy has side effects. Many patients especially in your age group experience a ranger of side effects. This doesn't mean to say the chemotherapy is not working'

He didn't believe me and i was finding it extremely hard to control my temper.

'Look. I know about the side effects. My hair has gone. Im trying to eat but Im not gaining any weight. My eyesight is suffering. But surely nineteen days into the chemo i should be feeling better? Even if its just a little bit. Im telling you Im not and i am starting to think that it is not working. Okay?' I said. As calm as possible. Not taking no for an answer.

He looked surprised. Shocked that someone would answer back. I didn't care.

'I assure you Mr Price, its not uncommon for leukemia patients to feel like this during chemo. However to put your mind to rest i will do some blood tests and another bone marrow biopsy i will also prescribe you stronger painkillers so you can cope better with the pain along with your top up. Okay? Now if you would go to Room 7A i will organise the tests. We should have the results back within a few days'

I got up and went to the fucking room. Not even thanking the idiot. What a moron.

They did the blood and bone thingys again. And yes the fucking hurt. I didn't faint during the blood test but it still felt like a vampire was sucking the life out of me. The bone marrow hurt the most. I had to lie down and it honestly felt like someone was stabbing a knife. I had to bite my lip from screaming.

After the awful tests. I went to pick up the prescription. Another paper bag of a cocktail of drugs. I could barely read the letters on the bag. As i left the hospital. Happy to be in the fresh air again. I staggered down to the alleyway and grabbed on to the portkey. I moaned in pain as fell on the lawn. I looked at the time. 1.10pm. Lunchtime. Everyone would be in the great hall. I would just quietly return to my bedroom and sleep for a few hours. I knew that Weasley would be pissed off at me for skipping potions and going to the hospital without telling him. I would need to find him later. Right now though i just wanted to sleep.

I slowly walked upto the Slytherin common room. Careful not to run into anyone. I opened my bedroom door and was shocked to find my curtains were wide open and a very angry looking Ron Weasley sitting on my bed.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**And if I only could,  
Make a deal with God,  
And get him to swap our places,  
Be running up that road,  
Be running up that hill,  
Be running up that building.  
If I only could, oh...  
**_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**Ron's P.O.V. **

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

When Draco didn't show at breakfast. I began to worry. When he wasn't in potions. I began to panic. When i went up to his bedroom to find an empty bed. I began to get angry. I knew where he'd gone. He went to the hospital without me. Preventing me from being there for him when he needed him. Just leaving without telling me. What happened to us fighting this together? He stood there in the doorway. He looked like he'd been in a fight and lost. He was covered in bruises, there was a big purple one on his cheek. He was as white as a ghost.

'Do i even need to ask where you've been?' I said angrily

'No' he said quietly

'Why the fuck didn't you tell me!?' I shouted

'You would have just worried about me'

'And you think by not showing up for class that i wouldn't have worried?! Draco ive been fucking out of my mind with worry!'

'Sorry'

'Oh and you think that makes it okay!? What happened to fighting this together? Do i mean fucking anything to you!?' I shouted. Shaking with anger. Regretting the last question.

'I said i was sorry didn't i?! Of course you mean fucking something to me! How can you even ask me that!?'

'Well start acting like it Draco, i wanted to be there for you. I always want to be there for you. Im trying to keep my fucking promise to you! But how can i if you don't fucking let me?!'

'Oh yeah i forgot its _you_ that has fucking cancer!' He shouted before pulling off his grey hat. 'Its _you _that lost all their fucking hair! Its_ you _that has to cope with the stares everyday of your fucking life! Yeah Im so fucking sorry Ron!' He screamed sarcastically.

I froze.

'Im sorry' I muttered.

'Don't be' He snapped back.

'What did the doctor say?' I asked

'Nothing. I just went for more pills. Everything's fine'

'Are you sure?' I asked. Not totally convinced by his summary.

'I just said didn't i?!' He screamed 'God you fucking treat me like Im a fucking five year old! Never believing anything i ever fucking say!'

'Calm down i didn't -'

'NO I WONT FUCKING CALM DOWN! YOU ALWAYS TREAT ME LIKE IM A FUCKING INVALID! AND I CANT FUCKING STAND IT ANYMORE! MAYBE YOU WOULD BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT ME AND MY CANCER FUCKING UP YOUR LIFE! YOU KNOW WHAT? JUST GET OUT!'

'Draco...' i said, shocked at his outburst.

'GET OUT!' He screamed

So i did. I left him. Slamming the door as i did. Feeling the tears fall as i left.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**Draco's P.O.V.**

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**You don't wanna hurt me,  
But see how deep the bullet lies.  
Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.  
There's a thunder in our hearts, baby.  
So much hate for the ones we love?  
Tell me, we both matter, don't we?**

**___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

**'Everything's fine'**

I lay on my bedroom floor shaking with anger, crying uncontrollably. Feeling guilty for lying to him and screaming at him but also feeling angry at him. He didn't think he meant anything to me. Was he fucking stupid? He fucking meant everything to me. I did everything for him. I couldn't tell him the truth. I wanted to but i couldn't. That my magic had stopped working and that my health was deteriorating. He would just worry.

I slowly picked myself up off the floor and walked into the kitchen. Needing to pour myself a bath. To wash the pain away. Both inside and out. I sat on the edge of the tub as it filled with water. Feeling weak. I was still crying as i got in the bath. I held my breath as i went under the water. Seeing how long i could hold my breath for. Hoping that by being underwater i could numb all the pain. I wondered how much longer my body could take this pain. Would i last long enough to see the results of Dr fucking Calvin's Blood test? No. I cant think like that. I would beat this. I thought as i came up to the surface of the bathwater. Taking a deep deep breath as i did. I sat in the bath for twenty minutes. Wondering why it wasn't helping my soothe my aching body as it usually did. I gave up after another ten minutes and slowly climbed out of the bath. After drying my bruised body off. I shoved on a pair of cotton tracksuit bottoms and a grey t-shirt. I shut my curtains and took two pills along with a painkiller. I fell onto my bed. My head spinning. My body aching. I fell asleep. Praying that by the time i woke up i would feel better.**  
**  
I woke up around seven. I opened my eyes to the horror that i couldn't see out of my left eye at all anymore. I still had a blinding migraine. My whole body hurt. I sat up, screaming in agony as i did. I couldn't breathe properly. I began to panic. I had never ever felt this ill before. What was happening? I just needed to find Ron. Then it would all be okay. I needed to see him. I needed to tell him that he meant everything to me. That i loved him. I slowly pulled myself up out of my bed. I felt _so _dizzy. Everything was blurry. I could just make out where my door was. Without putting any shoes on and forgetting to put my hat on. I slowly walked downstairs to the great hall. I was in a state of confusion and all i could think about was Ron. . .

.

_'Oh my god have you seen the state of him!?'_

_'Jesus, are you alright?'_

_'Oh my god. Look at that bald guy!'_

_'Ha look at him! He looks like a fucking zombie'_

Those where just a few comments i heard as i slowly walked to the great hall. I was too dizzy and confused to fully understand these people where talking about me and my eyesight had gone so blurry i couldn't even see them. I just kept on walking. And as i did. I felt blood fill my mouth. My gums must have started bleeding. A classic luekemia symptom. I was so dizzy i had to walk very slowly, one step at a time. I felt the cold hard stone floor on my bear feet. My eyesight was rapidly getting worse but i could just make out the doors of the great hall.

'Ron' I said. Too weak to shout. Letting the blood pour out of my mouth and all over my t-shirt. 'Ron?' I said as i staggered into the great hall.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**You and me.  
You and me. You and me won't be unhappy.**

**And if I only could,  
Make a deal with God,  
And get him to swap our places,  
Be running up that road,  
Be running up that hill,  
Be running up that building,  
If I only could, oh...  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

**Ron's P.O.V**

**________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

That night in the great hall it felt like i wasn't even there. It felt like i was watching myself from above.

I was watching myself laugh with Harry and Hermione while we sat at the Gryffindor table having dinner. I was watching myself put Draco out of my mind. I was watching myself as i heard Draco cry my name. I was watching myself , and everyone else see a bald, bloody and barefoot Draco Malfoy slowly walk into the great hall saying 'Ron?' over and over again. I watched myself run over as the crying and confused Draco fell to the floor. I watched from above as a crowd of shock pupils gathered around him. I watched myself push the crowd out of the way and i watched myself scream for help as i knelt down bedside Draco. His eyes were shut. The blood spilled out of his mouth. He wasn't moving............

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**C'mon, baby, c'mon, c'mon, darling,  
Let me steal this moment from you now.  
C'mon, angel, c'mon, c'mon, darling,  
Let's exchange the experience, oh...'**

And if I only could,  
Make a deal with God,  
And get him to swap our places,  
Be running up that road,  
Be running up that hill,  
With no problems, with no problems...  



	14. Frank

**Michael Jackson died when i started writing this. So i have been too busy glued to my television screen to finish writing this I've also had major writers block. Apologies. Im back now! But sad about Michael :( **

**To the reviewers - Thank you so much!!! I don't take myself seriously as a writer. Im crap compared to most of you so any positive feedback is always greatly appreciated and gives me a little more confidence. I know there's like a million spelling mistakes and i do try and proof read but Im a terrible speller!!**

**This entire chapter is Ron's P.O.V. **

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'SOMEBODY GET SOME FUCKING HELP!!!' I screamed. Looking at Draco. His eyes were closed. I ran my finger over his neck, checking for a pulse. Nothing. 'Come on, come on, come on' I said. I found one. His heart was still beating. _Thank god._

Next thing i saw was McGonagall, Snape and Pomfrey running towards me. Telling the crowd of pupils to move. I saw the shock in there faces as I picked him up.

'We need to get him to hospital. Now' I said

They of course thought i meant the school hospital. We took him there. Leaving everyone in the great hall to wonder what was going on. Leaving Harry and Hermione standing there in shock with their mouths wide open. But i couldn't think about them now.

I put Draco on a hospital bed. We tried to wake him. It didn't work. His temperature soared. Pomfrey looked scared

'What's wrong with the boy?' McGonagall asked me frantically

I closed my eyes 'Leukemia'

'What?'

'He has leukemia. You know, cancer?' I said quietly, seeing the horrified looks on there face. 'Cant you fix it!?'

They all looked shocked, even Snape.

'Cancer is a muggle disease' Pomfrey said 'Im not equipped to handle cases like this, how do you know that thats what he has!!?'

'He told me. I went to a muggle hospital with him and they gave him pills. I thought he was getting better.' I whispered, feeling the tears start to form.

There was a dead silence.

'What hospital Mr Weasley?' McGonagall said.

'I . .i don't know the name. A portkey took us there. It was in South London i think.'

They all looked worried. Like they didn't know what to do.

'Minerva, he needs to see a muggle doctor. We cannot keep him here. He wont survive the night'

I felt faint. Those last few words ringing in my head

_**'He wont survive the night'**_

'We must get him to this hospital immediately. Whereabouts is this portkey Mr Weasley?'

As i picked up Draco and lead them to the portkey. It was the first time i realise how light he weighed. It scared me. I could feel his spine. McGonagall went to calm everyone down from the drama that had just unfolded.

Before i knew it we were all in that filthy alleyway. Me, Draco, and Snape. There was no time to explain anything, still holding Draco, i ran into the hospital. I had no idea where i was, i ran up to the first reception area i saw.

I wondered what we all must have looked like as we walked in. I saw the muggles stare at us.

'We need to see Dr Calvin now!' I shouted at the receptionist.

She saw Draco in my arms and looked shocked

'Erm follow me. Jessica! I need a bed! Someone get Dr Calvin! Quick!' She shouted

Seconds later a woman wheeled a bed over to us 'Put him on here'

They ran as they wheeled the bed up the corridors. I didn't notice anything or anyone other than Draco. My eyes always on his chest, making sure it would rise and fall. Making sure he was still breathing. I didn't notice as people walked past. They put him into a small private room. It was dark. The nurses hooked him up to a machine. It made a beeping sound every other second, i assumed that was his heartbeat. I sat on the chair next to the bed. Snape looked at Draco, it felt weird seeing Snape worry. It wasn't in his nature. We were both startled at the door swinging open as a man in a white coat rushed in.

'Hello' He said 'Might i ask who you both are?'

'Im Ron, his cousin' I looked at Snape 'This is Sev, his godfather'

Snape shot me an evil glare, angry that I'd addressed him as Sev.

'What happened?' the man said as he looked at Draco

Not even let Snape open his mouth i answered.

'He collapsed, we've tried to wake him but . . nothing'

'And might I ask who exactly you are?' Snape said. His voice still calm and suspicious.

'Im Dr Calvin, I've been treating Mr Price' Snape looked confused before he realised Draco's name change. 'He was here yesterday, complaining about the chemo so i ran some tests'

'And?' Snape asked

'From what we can see his blood count isn't anywhere near what it should be. I already gave him some stronger pills in hope to speed up the process but his body has not responded at all. This is why the leukemia has got worse and resulted in his body attempting to shut itself down'

I felt like someone had shoved a knife into my chest as i heard him say that it wasn't working.

'So what else are you going to do?' Snape asked, this time i could hear the panic in his voice.

'At this point we only have one other option, Bone marrow transplantation'

'And what is that exactly?' I asked

'The transportation of bone marrow stem cells from a donor who matches Mr Prices blood type into Mr Price in the hope the marrow is regrown from cancer-free donor marrow. If successful, there is a chance it can cure his leukemia and put him in remission, which is what we want. But Mr Price has a very rare blood type. One i have only seen on a few occasions. I must be frank with you now, it is unlikely we will find a match, but we will try'

'And if you don't?'

'There's nothing else we can do' He said softly. 'I realise your both shocked, he will obviously need to stay here, we will need to put him into a medically induced coma. You should both go and get some rest. I assure you he's in safe hands'

Neither of us said anything. I couldn't breathe, let alone talk. I looked over at Snape. Who was in so much shock i thought he might pass out.

Snape took a deep breath 'May one of us stay here tonight?'

'Yes' Dr Calvin said 'But only one, now if you'll excuse me' He said as he left the room

Making sure Dr Calvin was gone Snape looked at me 'I will remain with Draco tonight' Snape said, in his normal cold, commanding tone. The tone that you did not argue back to. 'You will return to Hogwarts. And you will tell no-one of this business. Understand?'

Feeling defeated I nodded. I went to exit the room. I turned to look at Draco. He looked like he was sleeping. He still had on the grey t-shirt that was covered in his dry blood. It was unbearable to leave him like that. I wanted to be there until he woke up. But, knowing that wouldn't happen anytime soon, i left him. I left the hospital and went back to school.

It was nearly midnight when i got back to school. Everyone was in there common rooms. I prayed they would have all forgotten about Draco but deep down i knew that was all everyone would be talking about.

As i said the password at the entrance to Gryffindor common room. I hoped Harry and Hermione would be asleep. No such luck. Harry was sitting on the couch with a very nervous looking Hermione pacing around beside the fireplace.

'We want answers. Now' Harry said. Looking angry

'About what?' I said, trying to look as innocent as possible.

'Don't give me that bullshit Ron! About Malfoy! About what the fuck happened at dinner! That's what fucking about!!' He shouted as he stood up

'Harry calm down' Hermione said attempting to put her arms around his waist but he pushed her off.

'NO I WILL NOT CALM DOWN!!' He shouted 'HE'S BEEN LYING TO US! HE KNOWS SOMETHING AND HE'S NOT TELLING US!! AND WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HIS BEST FRIENDS!!'

'You are my best friends' I said quietly

Hermione looked at me. She didn't seem angry. Just confused. 'Look Ron, we all saw what happened to Malfoy. We all saw how he looked'

'He's just a bit sick' I lied, hoping they would drop it

'RON STOP LYING TO US!!' Hermione yelled. She was starting to get angry now. 'HE HAD NO HAIR!! HE WAS BLEEDING!! SOMETHINGS CLEARLY UP WITH HIM AND WE KNOW YOU KNOW WHAT!! WHY ELSE WOULD HE BE SHOUTING YOUR NAME?!! WHY ELSE DID YOU RUN TO HIM?!! WHY WOULD YOU RUN OVER TO YOUR WORST ENEMY RON?!! I JUST DONT GET IT!!'

'YOU WOULDNT BLOODY UNDERSTAND!!' I screamed at them 'YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HE'S GOING THROUGH!!, HOW MUCH HE'S SUFFERED IN THE LAST FEW MONTHS!! YOU WANNA KNOW WHATS WRONG WITH HIM? HE'S ILL, THERES YOUR FUCKING ANSWER!!, HE'S VERY ILL, SO ILL THAT HE MIGHT FUCKING DIE!! AND YOU WANNA KNOW WHY I RAN OVER TO HIM?! BECAUSE I LOVE HIM!! OKAY? THATS WHY!! I FUCKING LOVE HIM!'

I ran up to my dorm. Leaving them standing there, they were too shocked to say anything back to me. I was in shock at the fact that i told them i was in love with Draco. But right now i really didn't care. I slammed the door shut and put my back against it. Thinking about Draco. I always knew there was a possibility he would die, i never ever wanted to believe it but saying it out loud made it real. I couldn't lose him, i just couldn't. I loved him so much. I started to cry as i slid down against the wall into a heap on the floor. I cried because I was so scared. Dr Calvin's voice still ringing in my head.

_**'I must be frank with you now, it is unlikely we will find a match'**_

After I'd picked myself up off the floor i fell onto my bed. Still shaking at the hysteria of the last couple of hours. Still sobbing. Still unable to get Dr Calvin's voice out of my head. Unless they found a match, which Dr Calvin had said was unlikely then Draco would die. That was all i thought about before i eventually fell asleep. The fact that Draco's life was hanging in the balance and if they didn't find a match then the one person i care about more than anything else in the world, would die.

I would lose him.

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	15. Tomorrow

**Thank you all so much for the reviews! I am overwhelmed! Well, its getting closer to the end. Also I will be changing the title (again!) of this fic from 'Muggle Flu' to 'Pure Blood' Last time I do that I swear! Anyways enjoy xxx**

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I woke up after a restless night. I didn't sleep for more than a hour without waking up thinking about Draco. I was so desperate to see him. He needed me, now more than ever. I felt so useless. I didn't know how they would try and find a donor. I didn't really know what was going to happen anymore. They knew. The teachers knew he had Leukemia. Would they tell everyone? No. Surely not. Snape told me not to tell anyone and i wouldn't Draco would not want anyone to know. But would they tell his parents?

I knew they would, they had to.

Not even bothering to check the time i climbed out of bed and into the bathroom. Hoping a shower would keep the tiredness away. I needed to be there for Draco. I shivered as the cold water hit me. I was also hit with the realisation that I'd told Harry and Hermione my feelings for Draco last night. Out of anger and upset. I did love him. I thought i would feel shame or embarrassment but i didn't, i had bigger things to worry about. I didn't think they would tell anyone, maybe Seamus. I would make amends later. But now i had to go and make sure Draco was okay. Before i knew it i was out in the lawn. Then the alleyway. then the hospital. I didn't even go to the reception. I knew visiting hours were later on in the day but i didn't care. I walked into find Draco still lying there. They had taken off his blood stained t-shirt and given him a long top that said 'hospital property' on it. Snape was sitting on the seat beside his bed. Snape looked tired. It was strange, seeing him look anything else than a cold strict bastard was uncomfortable. He sat up when he saw me.

'And_ why _are you here?' He asked in the cold tone that i was used to.

'To see Draco, obviously'

'Strange. I would have never though you and Mr Malfoy were the best of friends' He said sarcastically

'I guess things change' I said, trying not to sound to rude.

'Interesting' He said as he stood up and walked out the room. I wondered if he'd gone back to school. I sat down on the chair next to Draco's bed. I took his hand and put it in mine. He still looked the same as I'd left him the night before, the machine still beeped every second. He still was breathing through a mask.

The door opened and i thought it was Snape but it was Dr Calvin, he looked stressed and tired and was holding a clipboard.

'Hello erm sorry what was it?' He said as he fiddled with his clipboard.

'Ron'

'Ah of course'

'How's he been?' I asked

'Still the same Im afraid' He said as he scribbled onto the clipboard

'Have you started looking for a donor? You know for the bone thing?'

'First of all we will need to see his parents and blood relatives as they are the most likely to have a match. Like i said his blood type is rare, A Negative, to be exact, a pure type if i do say so myself'

'Will only relatives be a match?'

'Well there most likely but in not all cases, we do get blood donations from plenty of ordinary people, you never, someone with a A negative blood type might be giving blood right now. Its just the timing, we need a donation as soon as possible'

'How rare is it?'

'I will not lie to you, A Negative blood type is very rare. In all my years as a doctor. Mr Price is the second patient who's had it. The first person who had it died years ago'

I felt panic. Draco's blood type was rare. So rare if his parents didn't match it then it would be unlikely anyone would. And if they couldn't find a match he would die. I felt a tear forming at the corner of my eyes but forced it back. I needed to be strong. I needed to be strong for Draco.

He gave me a sympathetic smile as he went to leave

'Dr Calvin?'

He turned around 'Yes?'

'Could we see if i might match?'

He looked at me for a few seconds 'If you wish'

They lead me into a small room. I already felt like this was pointless. I knew i wouldn't be a match. How could i be? Draco's blood type was rare. Very rare.

I waited for about 5 minutes before a nurse came in. She told me to sit down and roll up my sleeve, i nearly passed out when i saw the needle.

'Now this may hurt a little. . .'

It hurt more than a little. I felt faint. Like i was going to pass out. I thought of Draco throughout it. I thought that maybe just maybe i might have this super rare blood type. Although, deep down i knew the odds were against me.

I slowly picked myself up. And let her put a bandage around my arm. I needed to get back to Draco. I slowly walked down the corridor into Draco's room when my heart stopped.

Lucius, Narcissa and Snape where all standing there. Dr Calvin was with them, Lucius still looked as evil as he always did. His hair was scraped back like it always was. Narrisca looked down at her son. She at least looked

'What is _he_ doing here?' Lucius snapped

'He was the one that erm, found Draco' Snape said

'That's right, Ron brought Drake here along with Mr Sev' Dr Calvin nodded

'So what exactly is wrong with my son?'

Dr Calvin looked startled at the question, i guess he thought Lucius would have known by now. 'He has leukemia'

'And why haven't you fixed it?!'

'Im afraid its not as simple as that. We tried chemotherapy but he hasn't responded, like i was telling Mr Sev last night, we need to find a bone marrow donor as quickly as possible'

'And how did my son contract this disease?' Lucius said with disgust

'The cause of Leukemia is not known. However it is likely he was born with it'

Lucius looked as his son. Who was totally oblivious to what was going on around him.

'We will need you and your wife to take a blood test to see if you both are matches. The blood tests are quick and the results should come back tomorrow' Dr Calvin said

Lucius looked at Dr Calvin. Narcissa was sobbing by now. He looked at Dr Calvin with anger. He hated muggles, and he had just been told that his son had a muggle disease. I bet he must have been furious inside.

'Very well' He said reluctant to co-operate with a muggle.

'Excellent. Excuse me i will need to go and alert the nurses to set up' Dr Calvin said as he left the room. Leaving me, Snape and the Malfoys alone.

'How did this happen Severus?! Did a student infect my son with a filthy muggle disease?' He said as he gave me a look of pure hatered

'Lucius, the doctor just said-'

'Screw the doctor! Filthy muggles do not know what there talking about!! Haven't you tried to magically cure him!?!'

'Lucius, leukemia is a muggle disease. You know magic can not fix it' Snape relied

I looked at Lucius. He looked at his son with a look of pure disgust. I couldn't understand it. He had just been told his son had cancer. Even Narcissa, who looked slightly more upset than her husband. I just stood there. I didn't know where to look. I didn't want him to notice me. I was so thankful when Dr Calvin came in.

'We are ready for you now. Please follow me'

I watched as they both left. Not wanting to make eye contact with either of them. Again it was just me, Snape and Draco.

'You should be getting back to school' He said

'Why haven't you gone back?' I asked him nervously, scared of the reply

'That's none of your business. School. Now'

So i left. I felt slightly better knowing that right now Lucius would be getting a needled shoved in his arm. Surely one of them must match. I hoped it would be Narcissa because I couldn't imagine Lucius agreeing to the operation. Even if it would save his sons life.

As i got back to school i realised that i would have to face Harry and Hermione again. I didn't know what i would say to them, what could i tell them? That i was under the influence of a love potion and Draco was the first person i saw. No. They wouldn't buy that. I slowly entered Gryffindor common room. Hermione was sitting on the couch. Her head in a book. I looked around and there was no sign of Harry. I crept past her, hoping she wouldn't notice me.

'I can see you Ron' She said, her head still in the book.

I stopped in my tracks and turned to her 'Where's Harry?'

'At Qudditch practice, where you should be'

'Fuck' I totally forgot

'About last night-'

I interrupted 'Look i was angry, Im sorry i shouted at you'

'Its okay' She said 'Ron do you trust me?'

'Of course i do' I replied

'Will you tell about Malfoy?'

'I can't'

'I wont tell anyone. Not even Harry. If that's what you want'

I looked at her. I knew she wouldn't tell anyone. I wanted to tell her, i needed to talk to someone. I couldn't bear the lies anymore.

'Draco has leukemia' I said quietly, making sure no one else could hear

There was a long pause.

She looked up at me, her eyes widened and she let out a small gasp.

'Luekemia?' She asked

'Yes' I replied 'That's why he's not in the school hospital, he's in a muggle one'

'Oh my god'

'He made me promise not to tell anyone. I thought he was getting better'

'And he's not?'

I could feel the tears at the corner of my eyes. 'No, no he's not'

I sat down beside her. 'He's really unwell Hermione' I started to cry 'And i don't know if he will get better'

She put her arm around me. 'Oh Ron' was all she could say. She must have been in shock. 'Is he really that bad?'

'Yes. If he doesn't get a blood donation soon. He will die' I said as contused to cry

'Blood donation?'

'Yeah, he has a really rare blood type apparently. Unless his parents are a match. . .i don't know'

'I cant believe this. It does answer some questions though. He has looked really sick this year'

'Have people been saying much?'

'Yesterday they did. Most think he's been cursed'

'If only they fucking knew. . ' I whispered

'Ron' She said quietly 'Last night, you said you loved Malfoy'

'I know'

'Why?'

'I do love him Mione, i don't know why. I don't even think Im gay, its just. . .when he told me about the leukemia i just, had this incredible urge to protect him and look after him and just somewhere along the way, i fell for him'

'Does he feel the same way?'

'I don't know. The last time we spoke, we had a fight, a stupid fight'

She stared into space as she took it all in. It felt so much better telling someone about it all. I didn't have to lie anymore.

'Mione, has Harry said anything?'

'Not really. He _is_ worried about you. He hasn't said it out loud but i know he's thinking it. But all this stuff with Malfoy just seems to anger him, he thinks Malfoy has you under imperius curse'

I let out a small laugh.

'Have either of you told-'

'No' She quickly answered 'And were not going to'

'Thanks' I whispered. Wiping my eyes.

'Its alright , we are here for you know. And Malfoy....well i cant say Im his biggest fan but i wouldn't wish this on him. Lets just pray they find a match'

I hugged her. She was just what i needed. She was so understanding. I left her to her books and went to Slytherin common room. I quietly muttered the password and crept to Draco's bedroom. Thankful no-one saw me. I looked at his empty bed. Everything was just the way he left it. There was clothes lying on the floor and books on the table. I noticed the bedcover, sprawled over the bed in a heap. I made his bed when i noticed it, my jumper lying beside his pillow. I couldn't believe he still kept it. I brought it to my face, it now smelled of him. I started to cry again as i sat on his bed. Thinking about our stupid argument. Thinking about tomorrow. Tomorrow they would get the test results back. Tomorrow they would know if they had found a donor. Tomorrow i would know if Draco would live or die. It was as simple as that.

I got into his bed. Taking off my trainers and jeans. It felt strange being alone in his bed. He usually was with me. I would watch him sleep. I pictured his sleeping face next to me as i fell asleep. Knowing that this time tomorrow night, everything would change......

I slept for about seven hours. I kept waking up in a sheet of sweat thinking about Draco. I looked at the time - nearly 8am. It was a Sunday, I knew most people would be asleep as i got out of Draco's bed and got dressed. It would be a good time to make a sharp exit from Slytherin common room. I slowly open his bedroom door and crept my way out of the common room, I didn't eat yesterday so i was starving. I went down to the great hall for some breakfast. I munched down on my toast in an attempt to rid the horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. I felt sick. Thinking about the test results. I refused to let my mind think about what would happen if the Malfoys didn't match. It was just too painful to bear. I didn't want to talk to anyone. I just wanted to know. I finished my breakfast and went straight to the portkey. Before i knew it, i was at the hospital. I didn't even bother to check in. I knew it was out with vesting hours. I went into Draco's room and felt slightly relived at the fact that Snape wasn't there. It was just Draco. He didn't look any different. His chest still went up and down and the machine still beeped. I went over and sat beside him.

'Hey Dray' I said as i took his hand in mine

'I know you cant hear me. .but um. . .Im here, i miss you' I felt the tears fall from my eyes 'Listen, there trying to make you better Drake, they took my blood and they took your parents. We just need a match Dray and then we'll get you better. You just hang in there okay?' I whispered as i squeezed his hand. It destroyed me that he didn't squeeze back.

I sat there with him for about an hour. Holding his hand. He looked like he was sleeping. He was still so pale. I let go of his hand when Dr Calvin walked him.

'Good morning er Ron was it?'

'Yeah' I said, wiping my tears away furiously

He went to Draco's bedside and fiddled with the wires. He then wrote something on his clipboard.

'Err Dr?'

'Yes' He said as still kept scribbling

'Do you have the results back yet?'

'We will have the test results back in the next 30 minutes' He said 'His parents are on their way now'

'Okay. . ' I said quietly

After about 20 minutes, Lucius, Narcissa and Snape arrived. Dr Calvin lead us all into his office. Narcissa and Lucius sat down whilst me and Snape stood. I felt sick with nerves. I could feel myself shaking.

'We have the results' Dr Calvin said as he opened his folder 'As you all know Draco's blood type is A Negative, a very rare type'

'Get to the bloody point!' Lucius commanded

He looked at the Malfoys

'Im afraid you and your wife did not match Draco's blood type' He said

I felt like someone had stabbed me with a knife. That was it Draco would die. He would die! I could hear Narcissa screaming. I felt tears running down my face. I couldn't breathe. I could feel my heart beating faster than it ever had. I felt like i was going to be sick. I couldnt take it in.

'Mr Sev, you also did not match'

I wanted to scream. I felt the tears run down my face as i looked up at Dr Calvin.

Dr Calvin looked at me. There was no point i knew what he would say.

'However your blood type is A Negative. A perfect match'

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	16. Through the glass

**Okay guys this is the second last chapter! The end is near! And HBP is out next Wednesday - :D so excited! **

**This is also a songfic to Wonderwall by Oasis (one of my favourite songs)**

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**Today is gonna be the day  
That they're gonna throw it back to you  
By now you should've somehow  
Realized what you gotta do  
I don't believe that anybody  
Feels the way I do about you now  
**_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

_**'However your blood type is A Negative. A perfect match'**_

I couldn't move. It just kept spinning round and round in my head. I couldn't take it in. I could save Draco, he would be okay, everything would be alright. . . .

Then the sound of Lucius Malfoy screaming at the top of his lungs brought me down with a bang.

'I WILL NOT HAVE THAT FILTH IN MY SON!'

He stood up. He gave me a look of pure evil as Narcissa tried to calm him down. I had never seen him so angry before. Dr Calvin also looked shocked, of course he didn't know Lucius. He thought Lucius would be overcome with joy. We all knew better

'I must ask you to lower your voice' He said angrily at Lucius

'NO! THIS WILL NOT BE HAPPENING! I WILL NOT HAVE HIS BLOOD IN DRACO'

'That's enough! I have patients on this ward! If you do not lower your voice i will have you escorted off the premises!' Dr Calvin shouted back at a very angry looking Lucius. I just froze. I was doing this, it didn't matter if he wanted it or not. I was going to save Draco's life. 'Now if you'll excuse me' He said before leaving us all standing in his office. Slamming the door shut as he left.

'Its not happening' Lucius said again

'Lucius -' Snape said quietly

'No! You will not degrade him by contaminating his blood with this muggle-loving filth!'

'It will save his life' I said quietly 'You'd rather have him die!?'

He stood up and slowly came towards me, shoving his face in mine.

_'I would rather him die than have your filthy blood inside him' _

I wanted to kill him at that very moment. I wanted to punch and kick him until he was dead. I couldn't believe he would just let his son die. How could someone be so cold? I just looked at him, into those grey eyes that resembled Draco's. I could barely take in the words he was saying to me.

'Lucius, there really are no options left' Snape said

'There must be something! Anything but _him_! If we just take some more time-'

'Time is not on our side Lucius!' Snape shouted. He was starting to get angry now. 'Don't you understand?! If Weasley doesn't do this Draco_ will _die!'

Lucius looked at Snape. He no longer looked angry but instead a his face looked off pure shock his mouth wide open. I put my hand over my mouth, in shock at how simple it all was. Narcissa began sobbing as she looked down. Snape even looked shocked at the words that had just come out of his mouth. No one spoke for a few seconds.

'Look Lucius. I am Draco's godfather, if you refuse to allow the operation, then doctor has papers for me to sign and i will sign them. Do you understand?'

Lucius looked angry again as he stared at Snape. Giving him the same stare that he had given me.

'Come, Narcissa' Lucius said before he and his wife got up to leave. He looked at me 'You'll be sorry' he warned before leaving, slamming the door as he did. I went and sat down. Shaking will relief at what Snape had just done

'Thank you' I said quietly, not looking up at him

'Don't thank me Weasley, it needed to be said. The Malfoys have never been ones to show there real feelings. One day he'll thank me' Snape said

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**Backbeat the word was on the street  
That the fire in your heart is out  
I'm sure you've heard it all before  
But you never really had a doubt  
I don't believe that anybody feels  
The way I do about you now**

And all the roads we have to walk along are winding  
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding  
There are many things that I would like to say to you  
But I don't know how  
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I hadn't really had time to think about the operation. About what was going to happen. I was to stay overnight and go into theatre in the morning. I knew i wouldn't sleep. I didn't want to admit it but i was scared. Scared but happy at the same time. I was going to save Draco. I would keep my promise to him. One day this would all be some horrible memory. I stood outside Draco's room. Looking at him through the glass. He looked so peaceful.

'How are you feeling?'

I turned around to see Dr Calvin, handing me a cup of coffee.

'Okay' i lied 'Did erm Sev-'

'Yes he did' Dr Calvin smiled

'Good. . ' I whispered

'Its okay to be nervous, you'll be under general anaesthetic so you wont feel anything. It will be over in a few hours'

'Im not worried about me, Its Drake. Will he be okay?'

'Bone Marrow transplantation has a high success rate. If successful it will put him in remission but there is always a chance of death. I will not lie'

I just nodded as i turned back to look through the glass at Draco. My hand pressed against the glass

'We need to think positively, your doing a very selfless thing. You are very brave' He said 'You can go in and sit with him, talk to him if you like. They say people in commas can still hear voices'

I smiled at Dr Calvin as i went into Draco's room. It was just him and me. I put my coffee on the table as i sat down beside him. Hearing the machine go .. I smiled at Draco. He looked so beautiful. Like he did when he was asleep. I watched his chest go up and down. I took his hand and brought it up to my face. Kissing his fingers. Squeezing his hand.

'Hey you' i said quietly

He didn't respond. Of course he didn't.

'If you can hear me Dray, things are going to be alright. I kept my promise Drake, Im going to save you okay?'

I could feel the tears running down my cheeks. I didn't know why i was crying. With happiness perhaps. I lowered my head, not wanting him to know i was crying. I could hear the machine beeping.

I looked up at him. His eyes shut. I stood up. Looking over his face. Letting my tears fall.

'I love you Draco. I love you so much baby and i cant wait to see you again'

I kissed him on the forehead. Looking at the sleeping angel beneath me. Just for a split second i was happy. I thought everything was going to be okay. I thought this time tomorrow, he will be safe in my arms and the leukemia will be gone.

Then i heard it.

The machine. The beeping had stopped. It was just a noise it was like the beeping one but there was no pause. Just a noise that didn't stop. I looked up at the machine, the zig zag pattern had gone. It was just a long line.

'Draco?!'

I looked at his chest, it didn't rise.

'DR CALVIN! HELP! SOMEONE PLEASE HELP!'

Dr Calvin burst in along with two nurses. I was distraught. I could barely talk through the tears of panic.

'What's happening?!'

He didn't answer me 'GET ME NOW A DEFIBRILLATOR NOW!! GET HIM DOWN TO THEATRE NOW!!, WE WILL NEED TO OPERATE STRAIGHT AWAY!!'

I could barely stand before one of the nurses rushed over to me 'You will need to come with me. Now'

I didn't want to leave him, i cried as we ran down to a small room. I was told to change and get on the bed. I did as quick as i could. I was still crying my heart out as I lay on the bed. They wheeled me down the corridor. It was all happening so fast as i looked at the strip lighting on the ceiling. I rushed past them so quickly i couldn't count them. As we rushed down to theatre a man grabbed my arm. Shoving a needle into my vain. It hurt as i slowly drifted off to sleep, thinking of Draco as we went into the unknown. . . . .

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**Because maybe  
You're gonna be the one that saves me  
And after all  
You're my wonderwall.  
**


	17. Dead and Gone

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I slowly opened my eyes as i let the blinding light in. I felt extremely confused as i registered the place i was in. It was a small room. I was in a bed. It was light outside and i could hear the birds sing. I also heard a beeping sound. The place smelt familiar. I took a deep breath. I moved my body to make sure i hadn't lost any limbs. My mind began to panic as it was overcome with questions. I shut my eyes.

_**Where the hell was i?**_

_**What day was it?**_

_**What the fuck happened?**_

'Hey Drake, long time no see'

I opened my eyes again after hearing a voice. I looked over to see Ron sitting on a chair beside my bed. As i was looking at him, it all came screaming back to me. The leukemia. The chemo.

He looked tired as he smiled at me.

'Wha-' I spluttered as i felt my voice crack

'Shh have some water' He said as he brought a cup to my lips. I took a sip.

'Wh- where are we?' I asked

'St Thomas hospital. In London' He answered

'What happened?'

'You nearly died Dray, well you did die actually, they had to shock you back to life. But your okay now'

'The leukemia?'

'Gone. Your in remission. They said in seven months they would give you the all clear'

I couldn't believe it. Was i still dreaming? My head began to hurt as i tried to remember the last few weeks. It was all a blur. I remember the leukemia. I remembered kissing Weasley. I remembered our row but after that. . . nothing. I couldn't remember anything.

'Wh - why cant i remember anything?' I asked

'You have been in a coma for the last week' He said 'They said it would take a while for it to come back'

'How did it go away?' I asked him

He smiled at me 'I kept my promise Draco'

'What?'

'The chemo wasn't working, you were getting worse. They needed someone's bone marrow, problem was you have a really rare blood type so we all got tested and you'll never guess what Dray? I matched!'

'What?'

'I matched. I know its so strange, but i kept my promise. I saved you'

'You?'

'Yeah'

I looked at him. He smiled at me. He looked tired. He had a bandage around his arm. I didn't fully understand. I was still in shock at the fact that i didn't have cancer anymore.

'So you gave me your blood?'

'Yeah'

I looked at the ceiling. I couldn't believe it. If this was all a dream i never wanted to wake up. I remembered the last time i spoke to Ron, the row we'd had. I told him to leave me alone. I couldn't believe he'd risked his life in order to save mine. He kept his promise. He'd stayed with me.

'Oh my god' I said as i started to cry

'Hey' he said quietly as he held my hand. He squeezed it. I squeezed back. 'Don't cry'

'Im so sorry' I said as i tried to sit up. Not realizing how weak i was. He held me as pulled him towards me, my face in his neck, inhaling his amazing smell 'Im so sorry, Im so sorry'

'Don't be silly, what are you sorry for?' He asked as he squeezed me tighter towards him

'You risked your life for me' I said as the tears fell 'I was such a bastard to you and you did this for me, how can i ever repay you?'

He looked at me, tears were forming at the sides of his eyes. He put his hands on both of my shoulders 'Listen to me Draco, you don't need to repay me, i did what i did because i love you. I love you so much and i couldn't bear the thought of losing you. I love you' He said as he smiled at me

I smiled back 'I love you too' I said before kissing him. I brought my lips to his. Feeling the tears fall, tears of joy.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

'So you ready to go back?'

'Yeah'

'You sure?'

'Yeah Im sure'

'Okay'

I smiled as Ron pushed me down the corridor of the hospital. I was still shaky. So they insisted on making me use a wheelchair. I was still feeling lethargic but apparently that was normal for people who had been in comas. I still had a hat on. It would take a while for my hair to grow back and i would have to eat lots until i reached a healthy weight again.

As we got to the entrance of the hospital Ron knelt down beside me. He looked up at me, taking my hand in his.

'Look Draco, erm i don't wanna go back to meeting up in secret again. After nearly losing you its made me realize whets important in life. I don't care about anyone else. I just want to be with you, I want us to be a proper couple'

I smiled at him.

'I guess what Im trying to say is. . will you go out with me, you know? be my boyfriend?' He asked

I looked at him for a second before leaning over and kissing him. Throwing my arms around him. Not giving a fuck if people stopped and stared.

'Is that a yes then?' He asked

'Yes' I laughed

He smiled as he got up and wheeled me out of that vile hospital. We went back to the magical world. Ready to get back to reality, knowing that after what we'd been through, we could handle anything as long as we were together.

'Love you _Malfoy' _

'Love you too _Weasley_'

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**Lights will guide you home**

**And ignite your bones**

**And i will try to fix you**

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The end.

So that's it! Over! Awww it was a happy ending but i wouldn't really have had it any other way. I am starting a new Draco/Ron fic. This time it will be more dark and more brutal! But i hope you've enjoyed my story. Please review! Thank you xxxxxxxx


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